Just to Hold You Close and Tight

The walk home seemed darker than usual. Much darker, and very, very long. Unfortunately, the rest of the night was even longer. I didn’t get one minute of sleep, because Ray wasn’t there. It just felt so wrong without him. It was like the first night after my parents had finally taken away my blanky because I was “too old” for it, and I had to fall asleep without it. Except that this was much worse.

When it was six in the morning, I decided it was late enough for me to be officially awake. I rolled out of bed, took a shower, and sat on the bed. It was seven, and I decided it was time to call Ben’s cell phone.

A women answered.

“Hello?” I said uncertainly. “Um, is Ben there?” Of course, I knew he wasn’t.

“No,” she said. “Who is this?”

“It’s Amber Brennan.”

“Oh,” she replied, recognition in her voice. “You’re the girl he went out to lunch with! He was in a-” her voice cracked, and then she took a deep breath. “After he left from your date, he was in a car accident.”

I tried to ignore the word date, and I realized I was talking to his mother. “Oh, no!” I exclaimed. I had always been a fairly good actress. “Is he okay?”

“Last night the doctors thought we would lose him. Then all of a sudden, he woke up very early this morning. He’s going to live,” she said, almost as if she was convincing herself.

“That’s good!” I said. “How is he right now?”

“Oh,” she said slowly. “He’s still got a lot of injuries.”

I winced. I hadn’t realized that when Ray entered Ben’s body, he would still have all the injuries from the accident.

She spoke with even more caution when she said, “When he woke up, he asked for you.”

I pulled the phone away from my face so that I could sigh in relief. Ray had definitely made it. He was now in Ben’s body. When I had collected myself, I said casually, “Really?”

“Yes. He wants to see you,” she said stiffly, almost disdainfully.

Great, I though. She could be a future problem. Out loud. I said respectfully, “Is it okay with you if I come?”

She seemed to soften up immediately. I guess respect was the key. “Sure, sweetie,” she replied. “So you know where the hospital is?”

“Yeah, thanks. Is it okay if I come now?” I asked.

“It’s early, but that would probably be best. He’s awake… I think he’s waiting for you.” A little bit of bitterness returned to her voice.

I hesitated before asking, “Er, could you tell him I’m coming?”

She was surprised by my request, but she agreed to it. We said goodbye and ended our conversation. I flew down the stairs.

Just when I was about to reach the door, my dad said, “Amber! Wait. Where are you going so early?”

I glared at him impatiently. The only thing between me and Ray was the thirty minute drive to the hospital. I was way past eager to get there.

Gritting my teeth, I said, “Last night, my friend Ben was in a car accident. I’m going to see him in the hospital.”

“Oh,” my dad replied, stunned.

I took this as my opportunity to leave.

The drive to the hospital seemed like it lasted for hours. Every time I looked at the clock, I wondered if it might be broken. Even my music wasn’t enough to distract me.

When I finally reached the hospital, the lady at the front desk directed me to Ray’s room. I practically ran there.

A woman with blonde hair and blue eyes sat in a chair outside the door. When she spoke, it was easy to recognize her voice.

“Are you Amber?” Ben’s mother asked.

“Yes,” I replied quickly, thinking, Please, just PLEASE let me get into that room!