I Love You, I'll Kill You

Pain; it's a strange sensation when it fills one’s every being. My head was pounding. I could hear my heartbeat pounding in my ears. I groaned, lifting my arm up to touch my head to stop the pain. I struggled for a moment, trying to touch my head. Every muscle in my body ached. Everything, every noise was easily heard. I could hear a soft murmur of someone. I opened my eyes to see nothing but a blur for a moment. I blinked at least ten times before my vision finally cleared to reveal a nice room.

Where am I? I thought. I touched the fabric of the bed I was lying on and sighed. It was nice silk.

I pushed myself up into a sitting position and immediately fell back down. The pain in my head was too much to bear. I clenched my teeth and squeezed my eyelids as tight as I could, wishing that this pain would soon pass. I let out a sigh after many moments pass, the pain finally ceasing some. I didn’t understand this pain. Why was I feeling this great pain? My eyes opened slightly when I heard a knock from somewhere. It must be from somewhere else in the house. A click came, and then I heard happy and joyful voices.

"You guys look pretty good considering you drank more than anyone else at the party," an angelic voice spoke in a warm voice. I sighed at the sound. I wondered who the voice belonged to. A few laughs and chuckles escaped the other people. They sounded happy, like nothing could make them feel otherwise.

I finally decided to try and ignore the pain so that I could find out who those people were. I only hoped they were nice. Clumsy as can be, I somehow found the power to climb to the side of the bed. My feet touched the nice white carpet floor. It was a nice feeling. I took a big intake of air before standing to my feet—or attempting. My legs shook under me, threatening to buckle from under me. I took one step and fell. My body didn’t make a loud noise when it hit the soft floor.

"One more time," I told myself, pushing my body to lift itself up one more time. I used the bed for support, standing to my feet once more. When I could finally stand once more, I took another step. My legs didn’t threaten to give up on me this time. I smiled, taking one step after the other, gaining more confidence each second. I opened the nice, white door, only to be confronted by stairs. I stared at them like they were a death trap. I held onto the railing like my life depended on it until I reached the very last stair. Wrong move on my part.

My legs couldn’t handle the sudden movement, and I fell forward onto the wood floor, almost landing on my face. Luckily my hands stopped me from doing a face plant. I groaned, feeling my muscles tense, yelling for me to cease moving. I looked up from my position on the ground to see two nice looking people stare at me from what looked like a very nice living room. They gave me a worried expression for a moment before sending me a kind smile. I stared in complete astonishment.

The boy stood from his place next to the pretty red head and walked over to me. "Grace, are you all right? And I thought we drank a lot. What did Desmond do to make you feel better?" he asked, bending down to help me up. I blinked, not knowing what to say. Who was this person? Who were Desmond and Grace? It sounded like he was referring to me as Grace? Was I? He held out his hand, and I took it so he could help me to my feet.

The girl on the couch chuckled when I tripped over my feet when the boy led me into the room. "Are you feeling any better?" she asked in a kind voice, a warm smile playing on her lips. I sat down on the nice leather couch, unable to speak words. Footsteps came from somewhere in the big house, coming closer.

"Hey, you guys, this really isn't a good time-" I stared with wide eyes at the sight of a true angel. He stopped talking as soon as he saw I was sitting on the couch, but little of that reached my mind. He was perfect. His dark brown hair was just barely long enough that it could cover his eyes if he wanted it to. His eyes were a beautiful copper color, almost gold. His pale, almost shinning complexion made them flawless. Perfect. He stared at me with wide eyes, as though death itself was staring at him. The look sent shivers down my spine. The boy that helped me up returned to his spot next to the girl. I couldn’t keep my eyes away from the angel.

"Jeeze, Desmond, what did you do to make her feel better? She's acting like she's completely lost. What gives?" the boy asked.

The beautiful angel, Desmond, continued to stare at me for a long moment before finally acknowledging the boy's words. "Oh, you know...a little of this, a little of that. I'm not exactly a doctor," he replied in a jumpy tone. The boy lifted his eyebrow at the strange behavior of the angel. The girl did the same. The angel walked over to me in a quick movement, holding out his hand for me to take. I took it without a second thought.

"Excuse us for a moment. Grace is still a little unwell," he said quickly, sliding an arm around my waist. I shivered from his touch; it was cold. My heart beat faster when he practically dragged me up the stairs and back to the room I was occupying before. He pulled me into the room, practically knocking me off my feet, shutting the door as soon as I was in the room. He walked me over to the bed, making me sit down on the soft mattress.

"Grace, I need you to stay here. Take a shower and make yourself feel better. Whatever you do, do not leave this room. Do you understand?" he asked slowly.

I nodded my head. "Yeah, I understand." Why did I feel like I was being controlled by him?

He gave a warm smile. It shocked me. It was beautiful but sexy at the same time. "Good girl," he whispered. He leaned forward in a quick motion and kissed the top of my forehead. I stared in complete shock, unable to blink until I realized he had left the room. I sat there, blinking for a moment, still stunned by the beautiful creature known as Desmond. I touched my forehead where his lips had kissed. A warm feeling lingered where the silky lips had touched. I sighed, standing to my feet and walking to the shower.

"Wow," I whispered, glancing around the large bathroom. It was everything a girl could want in a bathroom. I closed the door, took my clothes off, and hopped into the shower. I enjoyed the warm water caressing my sore body. I made sure to keep my mind clear the whole time. I climbed out, drying myself off before getting out of the shower.

I entered the bedroom, checking to make sure no one was there before I walked in to get my clothes. I searched through the drawers until I found one that held clothes that looked like they'd fit me. I quickly slipped them on before rushing to the bathroom. For some reason my heart would not slow down. It was because of Desmond, I knew it. But there was something else missing. I couldn’t figure out what was missing. It was strange that these people were calling me by Grace—and I assumed that was my name—but why hadn’t I remembered that? I ignored the thoughts and I brushed my hair and teeth, feeling a lot better than before.

A bit of make-up awaited me on the bathroom counter. Mascara, a little eye shadow, and lip gloss was all I needed. I exited out of the bathroom and made my way out of the bedroom. I opened the door, but stopped when shouts and angry growls erupted from down stairs.

"Desmond! What were you thinking?!" It was the pretty boy.

"I don't know, okay? I just…I don't know, Ivan," Desmond mumbled, clearly sounding ashamed.

A loud snort came from the girl "Sure. I bet you drugged her and then raped her so that she wouldn't remember." The girl certainly didn’t sound happy.

"Stop it, Dawn," Ivan warned her, but not in a demanding voice. I had a feeling there was something between those two. A loud sigh escaped Desmond. It amazed me that I could tell who it was, even though I was up one level of the house.

"I just...couldn't stand it any longer." I had to listen extra carefully to hear his words.

"Couldn't stand what?" Dawn asked in a snotty tone.

Desmond spoke in a quiet voice, "Her sadness." My heart beat faster. I was sad? But why? Was there a reason for my sadness? And why did Desmond care? Maybe he was close to me in some way. I crossed my fingers at that idea.

Ivan repeated, "Her sadness?" It sounded like he didn’t buy his explanation.

"My heart may not be beating, but if it was, it would be breaking. Her tears and cries of helplessness and despair...they were killing me. I can't explain it. It's like I could feel her pain, and it was hurting me just as much to see her so miserable. Every time I thought of a way to comfort her, I held myself back. You guys don't know how it feels to want to touch someone so dearly, but are unable to. When I'm around her, my senses go wild. I can't help it. I only want to make her happy.

"So I did the only thing I thought would help her heal her heart. I erased her memory. I didn’t think it would erase that part of who she thought she was. I don’t think it erased what she’s learned in everyday life, such as cars and other things, but just the people and the instances that have happened. My only intention was to erase the memories of her life before she had come here…and the horrifying moments of being in this world." The last part took him a lot to mutter. I stood there in the doorway, frozen with shock. I became dizzy, not realizing that I wasn’t breathing. I staggered a breath, finally knocking some sense into me. A loud sigh erupted from Ivan. I could already tell that he was shaking his head.

"Desmond, you're so foolish sometimes," he murmured. I took silent steps down the stairs, inching my way toward the door. I felt confusion radiate from Dawn, even from where I was standing. All of a sudden, a loud, high pitched slapping sound echoed through the house. I took a quick glance around the corner to see Desmond's beautiful face slanted to the side, Dawn standing over him as he sat on the couch, holding her hand out like she'd just used all her force to slap him. She was shaking with anger, fury reflecting in her eyes. I could see all this with a simple glance.

"You egotistical, moronic, bastard!" she shouted at a level that made a car alarm sound like wind chimes. Desmond didn’t move, keeping his head tilted away from her. I couldn’t tell if he'd been hit or not. From the lack of color on his cheek, it didn’t seem like he had been hit at all.

"Do you realize what you've done?!" she screamed. "What is she going to think when she has to go through the whole scare fest all over again? Do you realize how frightened she is going to be when she finds out that there are creatures in this world that lust for her blood...you being one of them?" I couldn’t handle it any longer. I suddenly felt chilled to the bone. I dashed for the door, opening and slamming it shut in less than a second.

I ran blindly through the thick fog, not caring where I was going, as long as I was away from those strange people. Forgetting about safety and survival, I ran for the forest that was located behind the house, not caring that it was dark, cold, and dangerous at this time of night. Cold air entered and exited my lungs, burning them. I jumped over logs and bushes, pushing myself deeper into the dark woods. Tears threatened to escape. I fought them back, concentrating on dodging logs and other things that threatened to prevent me from running further.

Why? Why is this happening? What did they mean? Their words made no sense.

I let out a shrill of a scream, feeling my ankle twist and make a nasty cracking sound. I fell onto the damp ground, finally allowing the tears to be released. The pain was immense. I lay there on the cold and wet ground, even though many sticks and other wildlife were stabbing into me. The cold air felt good against my tearstained face. I sat up to touch my ankle, to check how damaged it was. I touched it, and cringed, biting my lower lip to the point where it was bleeding to hold back a pain-filled scream. The world spun from the great pain of my leg. I lay back onto the wet ground, knowing that movement was out of the question. My tears flowed like a waterfall until I knew that no more could leak from my eyes. I stared at nothing, not caring of the loud screeches and growls that echoed in the night. I thought it would usually scare me, but tonight, I could care less. All I wanted was for the pain in my left ankle to stop.

I lay on the ground for what felt like hours, staring at nothing. I began to shiver, the cold finally getting to me. It had to be at least forty degrees or below. The cold no longer felt good against my cheeks. Instead it felt like I was a human ice cube. The pain in my ankle wasn't helping. I tried to move again, but could make no more than a twitch before my ankle started to pulse again.

"I'm such a fool," I murmured to myself, paying no mind that my voice had cracked and sounded like I was suffocating. I gasped, hearing another sound of a growl. I lifted my head up slowly, looking around, but seeing nothing. I gulped, but my throat was completely dry. I knew that there was a creature staring at me right now; I could feel it. I gasped, hearing the sound of a twig snapping somewhere near me. My eyes searched frantically for any movement.

My breathing stopped, seeing a large, dark figure prowl toward me through the darkness. I tried to act like I was not alive, but it didn’t seem to fool the beast. It looked like the size of a bear. No, it was larger. It had to be at least 7 or 8 feet tall. It looked like a large horse. Its legs were skinny, but its upper half was large, full of muscle. Its light colored fur glinted in the darkness, even though there was no light. Its golden eyes caught mine. I watched in horror when it disappeared behind a tree, but didn’t come out the other side. I mentally prayed that it was not thinking of attacking me. I shut my eyes, waiting for the worst. Perhaps my mind was playing tricks on me…

"Hey," I soft voice came from above me. My eyes snapped open, and I looked up to see a tall figure stand over me. His eyes were almost the same color of the angel I had met earlier. If it wasn't so cold out I would be blushing at the sight before me. The boy standing over me was gorgeous, there was no arguing that. But the thing that made my blood pump faster was the fact that he had no shirt on, revealing his beautiful and built ivory top half.

He bent down next to me, a look of worriment and anxiousness sketched across his face. "Are you all right?" His voice was soft, like a cloud. I struggled to think of words, but came up with nothing. My ankle was suddenly feeling much better. "You must be in shock," he mused to himself.

You have no idea. I mulled over in my head, glad that no heat was able to flow to my cheeks.

"Is it your ankle?" He must have noticed that I was favoring my leg. I nodded my head, still unable to speak. He warmly smirked. My heart stopped at the pretty sight. He looked from me to the dark forest, and then returned to me once more. "What are you doing out here all alone? It's dangerous," he said, almost sounding like he was scolding me—or wanting to scold someone.

I looked down to the ground. "I was running away," I admitted in a low whisper. I felt his stare pierce through my very being.

"Why?" he asked, almost too low for me to hear.

"I'm scared. I don't understand where I am or even who I am." I must have sounded like a lunatic. I looked up when I heard no reply. He was staring at me with a sympathetic look. I quickly looked away, afraid that he was able to see through me. My eyes snapped back when I hear him stand to his feet, frightened that he was going to leave me. To my surprise, he walked to one side of me, and kneeled beside me once more.

"I can't let you freeze to death out here. We need to get you somewhere safe and warm," he said with a small smile. I nodded like an idiot, stunned from the angelic smile. "I'm going to pick you up, so be aware that your ankle is probably going to feel like it is being crushed."

I turned away, afraid to show my face. "Thanks for the warning," I mumbled, not knowing that he would be able to hear it. He chuckled beside me. He must have really good hearing. I felt his warm arms slip under me and lifted me up as though I was two pounds. I gasped and tried to coil into a ball in his arms, feeling shocks of pain jolt through my ankle. I felt dizzy again. I tried my best to ignore the pain when we began to walk. I sighed when I found that his walking was so smooth that it almost felt like we were gliding on the air.

"So, what's your name?" he asked, sparking up a conversation. It took me a minute to remember what Ivan, the pretty boy, had called me.

"I think my name is Grace. I truthfully don't remember anything...," my voice faded at the end. He mouthed my name with a small smirk. 'Grace.'

"That must be tough; not knowing who you are. You don't remember anything? Your parents? Friends?" I shook my head, refusing to let my sad eyes leave my lap. I shivered from the feeling of his skin against mine. It filled me with warmth after staying in the cold for so long. Strangely, his skin was very warm, almost hot compared to Desmond's.

"Well, Grace, I'm Shayne, Shayne Mullins." He sounded almost proud of the name. I nodded my head, mouthing his name too. A closed my eyes for a moment, but snapped them right back open when an image of Desmond flickered in my mind, almost as real as if he were with me right now.

"Is it your ankle?" Shayne asked. I blinked, not understanding why he was asking. I looked and noticed that my hands were clenched into tight fists. I nodded my head, pretending that it was the reason for my sudden tense behavior.

For the duration of the walk Shayne asked me questions about myself. I guessed most of them, not really knowing the answer. I asked a few, but he seemed unwilling to want to tell me the answer.

"What was with that thing in the woods before you came? You know, the one that looked like a giant wolf," I asked, feeling that I needed to get it out of my mind.

He stared at me with an eyebrow raised; looking as though I'd just asked the most obvious question. "I scared it off." There was pure sarcasm in his voice.

I frowned. "You're lying. I find it strange how the thing just disappears behind a tree, and you pop out in its place. Am I the only one who find that a bit strange?" It was my turn to lift an eyebrow to him.

He shook his head, almost looking like he was rolling his eyes. "Yes, you're the only one who finds it strange. Oh—wait, you don't remember, do you?" he stopped his ridicule, remembering that I had no recollection of anything but this night. I nodded my head as a reply. He smirked down at me in his arms. I tensed involuntarily.

"I guess I'll have to show you sometime."

I sighed. "Why do I suddenly feel nervous?" I asked myself, shaking my head a bit.

He chuckled, sending vibration through my body. "By the way, is there anyone who is looking for you? You said that you were running away, but I have this feeling that there is more to this story of yours." I didn’t answer. I figured that it was best not to talk about the others right now. I could already tell that they were going to be furious with me. I guess that's what I get for being reckless. I felt Shayne shrug.

"You don't have to tell me if you don't want to."

He sounds like an upset child who has just been denied candy. I didn’t understand why the idea popped into my head. I laughed at the thought. I saw from my peripherals that he was smirking down at me. He looked like he was happy that he was making me laugh. I glanced ahead of us and was surprised to see lights coming from a house.

"Where are we?"

"My house," he replied.

Shayne carried me up the steps to the house, and with one hand, opened the door. Warm air from the house brushed against my skin, but even then it was not as warm as Shayne’s body heat. Sudden loudness made me cringe.

“Hey! Shayne! Finally made it back! Took you long enough!” a loud, booming voice shouted from the rest of the crowd. All went quiet when the others realized me in Shayne’s arms. I stared at the small group. Six young men were sitting around a large TV, all holding a drink or some chips.

“Wow, Shayne. You go out to scout the forest, and you come back with a girl. Nice job,” one of the larger boys spoke, winking at me. I turned bright red. All of them were attractive, but not like Shayne or Desmond. They all were large built and strong; I could tell that by the muscles that stood out against their shirts.

“So, who’s the girl?” a boy at the very end of the couch asked, not sounding as enthused as the others. He glanced at me, and the darkness of his gaze sent shivers down my spine.

Shayne brought me closer to him, feeling me shiver. “This is Grace,” he began. I had a feeling there were going to a lot of questions from the looks on their faces.