I Won't Fear Love.

He was the kind of guy who loved so unselfishly
And everyone could see what a prize he was
Everyone but me
I must be blind
I must be the kind who don't know what they have
Till they're all alone and sad

There goes my baby
Like the sun fallin' out of the clear blue sky
There goes my baby
And it's gonna be a cold, hard night
Now that I finally see
How I need him to be
Right here by my side
There goes my baby
Bye bye, baby, goodbye

How could I have a love so fine
And not know what it's worth
Maybe this empty heart he left behind
Is all that I deserve
What kind of fool
Finds a perfect jewel and can't see how it shines
Till she's all alone and cryin'

There goes my baby
Like the sun fallin' out of the clear blue sky
There goes my baby
And it's gonna be a cold, hard night
Now that I finally see
How I need him to be
Right here by my side
There goes my baby
Bye bye, baby, goodbye

How I wish I could hold him in my arms and say
This time I'm gonna treat him right
But it's too late

There goes my baby
Like the sun fallin' out of the clear blue sky
There goes my baby
And it's gonna be a cold, hard night
Now that I finally see
How I need him to be
Right here by my side
There goes my baby
Bye bye, baby, goodbye
Bye bye, baby, goodbye
Bye bye, baby, goodbye

I sang along to my radio as I got ready for school; finals today.

The weekend before today; Will didn't show up for work he said he was sick, not feeling well. I felt horrible, myself.

I'm such an idiot!

I walked downstairs, back in hand hugged my mother and walked to the truck. I saw Dominic getting into his car.

I still had my options to pick from, and I've picked to wait. Even though...it's not one he gave me. He didn't want to wait a long time, and he doesn't have to.

I took off, and sped down my drive way with one hand on the steering wheel and one hand out the window.

~.~.~

"You're just gonna make him wait, Mare?" Beth gasped. I nodded.

"If he wants me, he can chase me."

"MARIELLA! This isn't freaking tag!" Alexis said, shocked.

"What do you take me for? A child? I know this, I'm..okay it came out bad. I'll change my words. It's what Beth has always told me, if it's meant to be it'll find a way. It's fate, destiny,my life. It'll happen, if it's suppose to." Beth groans.

"She picks now to follow my advice?! WHY DIDN'T YOU BEFORE!"She growled.

"I don't know....It just didn't make sense then...." I said softly, ignoring her shout.

"Take my advice before any of this happens!" She growled again, and I sighed.

"I'm doing things my way, not yours. So, I may take your advice now, but who said that I was following it completely? Give me a break, Bethany." I sighed and walked into class, pulling my shirt down since it was beginning to get to small and it showed some of my waist.

Remind me to give this to Heather.

"Well, I hope you all do great on finals." The teacher announced, "Good luck." and she handed out the paper.

Here I come.

~.~.~

"That must have been the worst test-thing ever taken!" Alexis groaned as she sat down in the truck, and Jimmy in the back. Along with Heather and Beth. Alexis need more space, so all three squished in the back.

"I hope it didn't put a lot of stress on you, Lex." I said, turning the left blinker on. Looking both ways and took the turned left.

"No, but you wanna know what puts stress on me?" She said, and turned down the music.

"What?" We all asked, and she looked exactly at me.

"What stresses me, is how she can be so blind as to whats lying right there in front of her nose. It stresses me because, clearly he loves her as much as I love Jimmy and she just throws it away. Like it means nothing, and I don't understand." I sighed, gritted my teeth and kept my face forward.

"Obviously, Alexis, some of us have a hard time with certain things. I'm not perfect! Why don't you just give me a damn break here, damn it!" I came to a red light and looked at my best friend. "If you were to understand, then maybe you wouldn't be so god damn clueless as to why it happened. But in your life every things so god damn easy for you! You're not as clueless as I am!" I said back, fighting tears. She looked at me, and I could see she was a little mad but upset at the same time.

"Maybe if you talked to us, Mariella, then maybe we could come to understand! Every things not easy for me!" I went, as the light hit green. I saw from the corner of my eye as she put her hand on her stomach, "Having a damn baby isn't easy! There's so many things that you have to watch out for! And there's when you're so fat, you feel like some big blob! Like you've swallowed a whole water melon the size of a new born! Thing weren't easy for when Jimmy and I were apart!"

"When you were apart!" I muttered as I sped up to get to her house, Jimmy was now living with her and her parents. "You're living this little fantasy world!"

She threw her hands up, "Do you think I planned for this? Do you think I wanted this? I do now, but before? No, I didn't! Shut up!" she shouted, and I gritted my teeth again.

"No, you Alexis. I'm so tired of hearing everything about Dominic! You've hurt him! How stupid are you! I already god damn know this! What about me!?" I Stopped in front of her house. "What 'bout my feelings, Alexis? Do you think I feel nothing? News flash, baby, I feel everything. Every fucking piece of me that's shattered! I felt it when I told him goodbye! I felt it when I messed my chance up with him! I felt it when he kissed me, when he kissed Heather! Just get out!" I shouted, with tears spilling down my cheeks, and I watched as she got out, followed by Jimmy and Beth. Beth was going over today to help with the baby room. Heather stayed in back as I put the car in drive and blared whatever station was playing on the radio and I'll be was being played, and tears spilled a little harder.

I had to pull over, since I couldn't drive like this. I felt the seat next to me move and someone wrap there arms around me.

"Shhh, Mariella. It's okay." My sister said softly, "Every thing gonna be okay." I cried into her shoulder.

Seems like I've been doing a lot of that, too. By the time you know it; I'm not going to have anything left.