I Won't Fear Love.

It's tomorrow, now. I'm leaving, just going to leave everything behind.

Every thing I needed was in my truck already, so I didn't need to worry.

Earlier, I had went out with my family. Dante had to leave early, because of work and he didn't want to. I already said my byes to Desiree, who is now back with Dante because of me, and every one else I said last night.

All but one.

"Goodbye, I love you! Drive safely, please?" My mother said as she kissed my forehead.

"I will, tell Dante to take good care of you and Heather, please?." And keep an eye on Dominic, I wanted to add. But I couldn't bring myself to think of it. She embraced me into a motherly hug.

"Mariella, we'll be fine. I promise." It isn't really them I worried about, I know they will be fine. I was worried about Dominic. "Visit us, will you? I'm scared still, Mari. You're eighteen, and going to live on your own. I don't like this, but I guess every mother wouldn't. Especially if their daughter is going to live miles and miles away. I love you, Mari. We all do. Dante, Heather, Dominic, all your friends and I will miss you. Even if your brother couldn't make it. He loves you, and will miss you." She kissed my forehead one last time.

"I love you guys, too. I'll miss you more than you'll know." And Dominic. My sister pulled me into a hug and sniffed.

“I love you, too, sis!” she said between little sniffles. I hugged her back and kissed her forehead.

Tell me, am I doing the right thing? I've wanted to go to Mississippi so long. Ever since I was younger.

But I've known Dominic my whole life.

"WAIT! MARIELLA! WAIT!" I heard another car in our driveway and saw Dante. Some part of me wanted it to be Dom. He jumped out of the car and ran towards me. "I'm going to miss you like hell, little sis." He said, bear hugging me.

"Dante. Can't. Breathe!" I said, trying to get even breaths out so I could breathe well.

"Sorry." He loosened up. "I really am gonna miss you, ya know?"

"I know, and I'm going to miss you. You, Heather, and everyone else.”He looked at me, then to mom.

"Ma, Heather? Can you give us a few minutes?" He asked. My mother nodded, grabbed my sisters hand and walked into the house, hugging me one last time before she did. I could tell she was keeping back tears. "Mari?" I didn't know I was crying until Dante hugged me once more. "Mari, it's okay."

"Am I messing something up, Dante? Am I? I feel so horrible." I wiped my face with my sleeve and looked towards Dominic's empty house. He was at work today, he knew I was leaving today. I would have thought he'd be there to say bye. "He's not even here! This sucks, really bad."

Did you expect him to be here?
I wish he was.
Well, he isn't
Well, obviously.

What's going to happen when I leave? What is going to be come of Dom? "Oh fuck me side ways. What's going to happen?"

"Mari, you wanted to do this since you were younger. Do you really want to do this?" He asked, looking towards the house, too. I sighed.

"Yes, I do."

"Then go for what you want." He hugged me and I shook my head.

"Alright. I will." I hugged him back, tightly.

"Keep in touch, little sis. You'll figure things out, I promise."

"I will. Uhm, tell Dom..Tell him.." Tell him what? I'll miss him? Thank you? "Tell him...Goodbye for me, and..I guess...I'll miss him." He nodded and I got into my car. "Tell everyone I love them." He nodded again. I shut the door and waited a couple seconds, and started the car again. I waved and backed out of the car.

Hours later I was in Auburn Mass. And something hit me..

I've always wanted someone to like me, you know? Everyone does. And then someone likes me, well...loves me. What is love? Surely this isn't love, is it?

Everyone says it when you get all those butterfly's in your stomach, when nothing else in the world matters but that person. When all you see is..him.

I've grown up with Dominic, always fighting with him. Never did I know he had these feelings. All we did was fight, we rarely talked. Damn, does life get confusing. Maybe he was right, maybe I was afraid. I was afraid to let him in. But why?