Out of the Ordinary
Am I wrong or am I right?
It was now Wednesday, I was walking to my last class, more sad than I had ever felt. I wore my red British Punk top and Jenn planned to wear her white one, it was just one shirt among others that we had purchased Monday. I was more depressed because I thought Noah would be back already, Tuesday made 4 days today marked the fifth and I felt like he'd come back the same time as my family. I didn't just miss him, it was because I had hope that I wouldn't be alone as long as I would be if I was just living with my family.
I walked in to class, the class that I had both Jenn and Noah for, it seemed like everyone was still a bit hesitant to be my friend. Max actually said hi now, my guess was Jenn threatened him to be nice. I didn't know anyone else's names so it didn't really matter if they wanted to be friends or if they said their hellos.
The class seemed to take longer than usual, I found myself reading a book that was titled Sandcastles by Luanne Rice. I wasn't done with the book but it was amazing how much love a family could have no matter what happened. It reminded me of my family, only my father didn't need to protect anyone ending up in jail. It reminded me how much we all love each other, even if my brother doesn't like to really show his feelings.
Jenn walked with me to my car, she seemed to take on a tradition of this. We stopped just before, well more like she grabbed my arm before I could walk to my side of the car. "I just wanted to let you know that you don't have to worry because he's coming back, I can see it, your family is in little danger and they will return when they say." She smiled wistfully and quickly walked away. I stared after her. Why did she have a tendency to be so...up front but yet waiting till you are alone so that you have time to freak out by yourself.
None the less I believed her and so I gave a small smile in the direction she had left and went in my car. I decided I would drive home slowly, I did this some days when I couldn't stand being home by myself; having a fairly large house made it seem all the more empty. It took me about 30 minutes from school to my house after school. In the morning everyone was speeding that it didn't matter how fast I was going and I usually arrived at school half the time it took to drive back to my house.
I paused at the first few steps of the long stairs leading to the front door; I looked out at the ocean, it was as beautiful as ever, life growing in it everyday, beautiful creatures both deadly and harmless, and now my family and Noah. I frowned and headed on in.
I placed my car keys on the counter and put my bag on a stool once I entered the kitchen. I hadn't noticed it before since my head was still focused on the ocean, but my house smelled good. It smelled like someone was cooking, and I looked at the stove but there was nothing there. Maybe it was all in my head. I turned around to the fridge and grabbed me a bottle of water, turned back around and was lucky it was plastic. I jumped up and screamed to see someone behind me.
"What took you so long? I expected you back a long time ago." He looked at me sternly but gave in to a wide smile now placed on my face and he smiled back. "When did you get back Noah?" I asked looking deeply into his eyes; I felt like melting away. "Well, about an hour ago, now will you answer my question please?" He begged more with his eyes, boring into mine, than with his words. I smiled more and explained it to him.
"I'm glad you're back." I said in a whispered voice. And he pulled me into a hug, first holding me gently and then tightening his grip; I did the same. We just swayed back and forth in the kitchen. And then he broke apart from me. "Oh no." I thought he was saying this to me, as in 'Oh no, why am I hugging you' but then he rushed over to the stove and pulled the oven open and took out a large dish.
It was what I had smelled earlier, it looked like lasagna. "O.k. good, it's not burnt." Noah said eying the dish. It's just right, oh well maybe except that part, but it's just us and a few people from school."
I raised my eyebrow at him. "Oh yeah, well I asked if we could have a dinner party, and your parents said yes. And so when I was waiting for you I made some phone calls. I hear you and Jenn are pretty close now." The way he said that last sentence made it sound like he was questioning me.
"Yeah, she understands and I guess has no hard feelings." I mumbled staring at the dish as he placed it on the table. He didn't say anything after that. He grabbed my hand and led me out the door. We walked down to the shore, I took my shoes and socks off and folded my jeans up so that I could walk closer to the water.
He just smiled as we looked out, we stayed standing there for a while then he walked to where the water wouldn't reach us and we sat down. I didn't sit right next to him, I was now feeling as if our kiss that night was just a dream or a strange fantasy day dream that I never knew I wanted till it happened. But then Noah slid closer to me. He grabbed my arm and put it underneath his and he held my hand on his knee, he was sitting with his knees close to his chest. I took in a long breath and smiled as he was rubbing my hand with his thumb, and then he lifted my hand up and kissed my hand.
I didn't know if I could really count on him, or what his feelings for me were, and so I felt insecure but reassured at the same time. he turned to me and seemed to have seen my insecurities by how my face looked. He smiled a small smile and opened his arms. I leaned forward and let him hold me closer to his chest. I could hear his heart beating, I could feel his breath on my neck because my hair was up in a ponytail, and I could feel his chest rising as he breathed. It felt peaceful. I could sleep like this; it was very calming. He lifted me back up so that I was sitting on my own instead of leaning against him, and he just looked into my eyes. I wanted to turn and look away but I didn't need to because then he leaned over and kissed my cheek. And then he moved over to my mouth and kissed me again.
I moved away. He looked hurt that I did, but I was to mixed up with emotions right now that I couldn't handle that. I got up and looked down at him, he refused to look at me and so I walked back to the house and took a shower.
Once I got out I heard voices from down stairs, laughing. At first I was going to run down in my towel because I thought it was my family. But then I recognized Jenns laugh and remembered that Noah had invited people over for dinner. It was my house and I didn't invite them, did that excuse me from not going down?
"ERIN! HURRY UP WOULD YOU?" Jenn yelled at me. I guess I would take that as a no.
I dressed in a tank top and a jacket and shorts, it was still my house so I didn't have to dress up, right? Well, wrong again. I got down stairs and all the girls were wearing a sun dress, or something nice, and the guys weren't wearing any baggy pants. I considered for a second going back up to change but Jenn already saw me and waved so everybody turned on the couch and chairs to look at me. I smiled softly and turned around to go in the kitchen, wishing I hadn't. I should have realized that Noah would be in here. He looked up, gave me a nod and kept tossing the salad in front of him.
It's now or I'll never get the courage to ask him. "Noah, are you mad at me?"
He abruptly stopped tossing the salad. "Let's not talk about this now." he said quickly through gritted teeth. He then grabbed up the salad bowl and went to the dining room across the hall. I felt a pang of pain and right then I new this wasn't going to end good.
I grabbed up the lasagna dish and brought it to the dining room. It had tons of pictures hanging on the wall, with seashells here and there, and two old china cabinets at either end. Noah nodded to where he wanted the dish and I set it down. I walked back into the kitchen with him. "No-" I started but he cut me off, I was going to say his name. "Don't, I said not now, so just leave it alone. We have guests now. let's just go out and eat and we'll talk some other time." He said harshly and he grabbed a pitcher and left me alone in the kitchen and then I grabbed more napkins before I went back outside.
Jenn seemed to be the only one who noticed I wasn't myself she asked me what was wrong when everyone was too loud to hear her. I shook my head and she grabbed my hand that was laying on my lap. She sighed and then let it go. "He'll tell you eventually." she said.
The rest of the night I stayed quiet. Since it was a school night everyone left as late as they were allowed to, which was 10:30pm. Noah walked everyone outside, I waited so we could finally talk, but he never came in. At 11 I went to my room and I could have sworn I heard him sneaking inside the house. I shook my head, he'd talk to me eventually, right?
I walked in to class, the class that I had both Jenn and Noah for, it seemed like everyone was still a bit hesitant to be my friend. Max actually said hi now, my guess was Jenn threatened him to be nice. I didn't know anyone else's names so it didn't really matter if they wanted to be friends or if they said their hellos.
The class seemed to take longer than usual, I found myself reading a book that was titled Sandcastles by Luanne Rice. I wasn't done with the book but it was amazing how much love a family could have no matter what happened. It reminded me of my family, only my father didn't need to protect anyone ending up in jail. It reminded me how much we all love each other, even if my brother doesn't like to really show his feelings.
Jenn walked with me to my car, she seemed to take on a tradition of this. We stopped just before, well more like she grabbed my arm before I could walk to my side of the car. "I just wanted to let you know that you don't have to worry because he's coming back, I can see it, your family is in little danger and they will return when they say." She smiled wistfully and quickly walked away. I stared after her. Why did she have a tendency to be so...up front but yet waiting till you are alone so that you have time to freak out by yourself.
None the less I believed her and so I gave a small smile in the direction she had left and went in my car. I decided I would drive home slowly, I did this some days when I couldn't stand being home by myself; having a fairly large house made it seem all the more empty. It took me about 30 minutes from school to my house after school. In the morning everyone was speeding that it didn't matter how fast I was going and I usually arrived at school half the time it took to drive back to my house.
I paused at the first few steps of the long stairs leading to the front door; I looked out at the ocean, it was as beautiful as ever, life growing in it everyday, beautiful creatures both deadly and harmless, and now my family and Noah. I frowned and headed on in.
I placed my car keys on the counter and put my bag on a stool once I entered the kitchen. I hadn't noticed it before since my head was still focused on the ocean, but my house smelled good. It smelled like someone was cooking, and I looked at the stove but there was nothing there. Maybe it was all in my head. I turned around to the fridge and grabbed me a bottle of water, turned back around and was lucky it was plastic. I jumped up and screamed to see someone behind me.
"What took you so long? I expected you back a long time ago." He looked at me sternly but gave in to a wide smile now placed on my face and he smiled back. "When did you get back Noah?" I asked looking deeply into his eyes; I felt like melting away. "Well, about an hour ago, now will you answer my question please?" He begged more with his eyes, boring into mine, than with his words. I smiled more and explained it to him.
"I'm glad you're back." I said in a whispered voice. And he pulled me into a hug, first holding me gently and then tightening his grip; I did the same. We just swayed back and forth in the kitchen. And then he broke apart from me. "Oh no." I thought he was saying this to me, as in 'Oh no, why am I hugging you' but then he rushed over to the stove and pulled the oven open and took out a large dish.
It was what I had smelled earlier, it looked like lasagna. "O.k. good, it's not burnt." Noah said eying the dish. It's just right, oh well maybe except that part, but it's just us and a few people from school."
I raised my eyebrow at him. "Oh yeah, well I asked if we could have a dinner party, and your parents said yes. And so when I was waiting for you I made some phone calls. I hear you and Jenn are pretty close now." The way he said that last sentence made it sound like he was questioning me.
"Yeah, she understands and I guess has no hard feelings." I mumbled staring at the dish as he placed it on the table. He didn't say anything after that. He grabbed my hand and led me out the door. We walked down to the shore, I took my shoes and socks off and folded my jeans up so that I could walk closer to the water.
He just smiled as we looked out, we stayed standing there for a while then he walked to where the water wouldn't reach us and we sat down. I didn't sit right next to him, I was now feeling as if our kiss that night was just a dream or a strange fantasy day dream that I never knew I wanted till it happened. But then Noah slid closer to me. He grabbed my arm and put it underneath his and he held my hand on his knee, he was sitting with his knees close to his chest. I took in a long breath and smiled as he was rubbing my hand with his thumb, and then he lifted my hand up and kissed my hand.
I didn't know if I could really count on him, or what his feelings for me were, and so I felt insecure but reassured at the same time. he turned to me and seemed to have seen my insecurities by how my face looked. He smiled a small smile and opened his arms. I leaned forward and let him hold me closer to his chest. I could hear his heart beating, I could feel his breath on my neck because my hair was up in a ponytail, and I could feel his chest rising as he breathed. It felt peaceful. I could sleep like this; it was very calming. He lifted me back up so that I was sitting on my own instead of leaning against him, and he just looked into my eyes. I wanted to turn and look away but I didn't need to because then he leaned over and kissed my cheek. And then he moved over to my mouth and kissed me again.
I moved away. He looked hurt that I did, but I was to mixed up with emotions right now that I couldn't handle that. I got up and looked down at him, he refused to look at me and so I walked back to the house and took a shower.
Once I got out I heard voices from down stairs, laughing. At first I was going to run down in my towel because I thought it was my family. But then I recognized Jenns laugh and remembered that Noah had invited people over for dinner. It was my house and I didn't invite them, did that excuse me from not going down?
"ERIN! HURRY UP WOULD YOU?" Jenn yelled at me. I guess I would take that as a no.
I dressed in a tank top and a jacket and shorts, it was still my house so I didn't have to dress up, right? Well, wrong again. I got down stairs and all the girls were wearing a sun dress, or something nice, and the guys weren't wearing any baggy pants. I considered for a second going back up to change but Jenn already saw me and waved so everybody turned on the couch and chairs to look at me. I smiled softly and turned around to go in the kitchen, wishing I hadn't. I should have realized that Noah would be in here. He looked up, gave me a nod and kept tossing the salad in front of him.
It's now or I'll never get the courage to ask him. "Noah, are you mad at me?"
He abruptly stopped tossing the salad. "Let's not talk about this now." he said quickly through gritted teeth. He then grabbed up the salad bowl and went to the dining room across the hall. I felt a pang of pain and right then I new this wasn't going to end good.
I grabbed up the lasagna dish and brought it to the dining room. It had tons of pictures hanging on the wall, with seashells here and there, and two old china cabinets at either end. Noah nodded to where he wanted the dish and I set it down. I walked back into the kitchen with him. "No-" I started but he cut me off, I was going to say his name. "Don't, I said not now, so just leave it alone. We have guests now. let's just go out and eat and we'll talk some other time." He said harshly and he grabbed a pitcher and left me alone in the kitchen and then I grabbed more napkins before I went back outside.
Jenn seemed to be the only one who noticed I wasn't myself she asked me what was wrong when everyone was too loud to hear her. I shook my head and she grabbed my hand that was laying on my lap. She sighed and then let it go. "He'll tell you eventually." she said.
The rest of the night I stayed quiet. Since it was a school night everyone left as late as they were allowed to, which was 10:30pm. Noah walked everyone outside, I waited so we could finally talk, but he never came in. At 11 I went to my room and I could have sworn I heard him sneaking inside the house. I shook my head, he'd talk to me eventually, right?