Fortuitous
The First Time
My parents might as well have been the ones in love with him.
It was astounding how quickly
They forgot their anger when they met him.
Forgot that he was older.
Forgot that I wasn't supposed to date.
Charms, manners, and a successful father won them over.
They had no idea that in a few months,
He would beat their little girl.
Their one and only.
Little girl.
I had no idea.
Officially,
We had been together for a one year,
Five months, and
Twelve days.
Those first five months were honestly the best part of our relationship.
He was so sweet.
He was so shy.
He laughed.
He blushed.
He knew how to make me smile.
He made me safe and wanted.
I could fondly recall a day at the park.
He pushed me on the swing.
He caught the chains and pulled it to him
So my back was against his chest.
He turned my head, paused, and then leaned down
To put my lips
To his.
Our first and best kiss.
We were there,
At the same park,
At the same wing,
One year later.
He wasn't pushing me.
He was just standing behind me.
Standing still.
His right hand was gripping my arm tightly.
His left had holding the chain of the swing
To keep it
Immobile.
"What are you thinking about, sweetness?"
"Our first kiss."
My voice was soft.
My gaze was on the ground.
I was stroking his fingers around my arm.
His grip grew soft.
I felt his lips on the back of my head
He inhaled deeply.
He smelled my hair.
"We had the best first kiss, didn't we?"
"We really did," I whispered.
He went silent.
The only sound heard were the
Birds above us and the
Kids laughing behind us.
He asked me what had happened to us.
He said that he hit me.
He said that he loved me.
He said that he made me cry.
He said he used to make me happy.
I told him that he still made me happy.
He said he was a monster.
And I agreed.
And I told him that he was my monster.
Only mine.
And I was his.
Only his.
He smiled.
He touched my cheek.
His lips met mine.
Just like the first time.
He called me sweetness
And told me he loved me.
I called him baby.
And told him I loved him.
Because I did.
It was astounding how quickly
They forgot their anger when they met him.
Forgot that he was older.
Forgot that I wasn't supposed to date.
Charms, manners, and a successful father won them over.
They had no idea that in a few months,
He would beat their little girl.
Their one and only.
Little girl.
I had no idea.
Officially,
We had been together for a one year,
Five months, and
Twelve days.
Those first five months were honestly the best part of our relationship.
He was so sweet.
He was so shy.
He laughed.
He blushed.
He knew how to make me smile.
He made me safe and wanted.
I could fondly recall a day at the park.
He pushed me on the swing.
He caught the chains and pulled it to him
So my back was against his chest.
He turned my head, paused, and then leaned down
To put my lips
To his.
Our first and best kiss.
We were there,
At the same park,
At the same wing,
One year later.
He wasn't pushing me.
He was just standing behind me.
Standing still.
His right hand was gripping my arm tightly.
His left had holding the chain of the swing
To keep it
Immobile.
"What are you thinking about, sweetness?"
"Our first kiss."
My voice was soft.
My gaze was on the ground.
I was stroking his fingers around my arm.
His grip grew soft.
I felt his lips on the back of my head
He inhaled deeply.
He smelled my hair.
"We had the best first kiss, didn't we?"
"We really did," I whispered.
He went silent.
The only sound heard were the
Birds above us and the
Kids laughing behind us.
He asked me what had happened to us.
He said that he hit me.
He said that he loved me.
He said that he made me cry.
He said he used to make me happy.
I told him that he still made me happy.
He said he was a monster.
And I agreed.
And I told him that he was my monster.
Only mine.
And I was his.
Only his.
He smiled.
He touched my cheek.
His lips met mine.
Just like the first time.
He called me sweetness
And told me he loved me.
I called him baby.
And told him I loved him.
Because I did.