Your Hand in Mine

I woke up in the morning in Gabes arms. His lovely smell filled my nostrils, as his heartbeat filled my ears. I smiled and made circles on his chest. His grip tightened, and I knew that he was awake.

"Morning Gabe."

"Good morning Gracie-Mae. I love you." He said in a tired, cute, voice.

Butterflies swarmed my stomach.

"I love you too, Gabe." A smile on my face and my heart beating rapidly.

"I know." He answered, warmly, his warm breath hitting my head, sending chills down my spine.

I looked up at him, and he smiled down at me. His face inched closer to me, my heart beat picking up, and my lip beginning to quiver from the amount of lush feelings running through my veins. He lightly pressed his lips to mine and my heart stopped. My lips tingled beneath his, and a feeling took over me- one I couldn't resist. I couldn't resist him. My fingers tangled in his messy hair, and I pressed myself to him more, yearning for his touch. He didn't push me away or tense up at all. Instead, he embraced it and gripped tighter to me, running a hand through my hair- brushing my cheek.

We pulled away for a moment and looked in each others eyes- just stared, intently, and my cheeks burned red from his gaze. Minutes seemed to fly by. I don't know what has taken over me, really.

"I'll go make some breakfast and get William up, then we can have some fun or something."

I nodded, and he slowly stood up, put on some pants and slipped out of the room. I sighed at his exit and stared up at the ceiling, a million thoughts running through my mind.

Gabe has always been my savior. For five years he's been all I've known, all I've wanted. He saved me from a boring life, from being further raped and fucked up, he saved me from depressed, he saved me from myself. From my own self distruction. He had always made it so I could get through everything. He has always been my shoulder to cry on, the boy to run to, the one that could make me laugh when I was crying, the one that'd drop everything on a dime for me. He was the best person you could ask for. The best, best friend ever. Thinking over these last few years, through all the torture I've been through, I'd never take any of it back. I'd never take back being raped and feeling used, losing my innocence, none of that because it means I wouldn't have met him.

From that very night, I knew there was something special with Gabe. From the moment I looked in his eyes, I knew-somewheres in my mind- that he'd always be my saviour. Gabe has always been my sunlight, my shining star, my rainbow after the storm. Nomatter what bad happened, I could always expect for something better to happen.

And I've learned, though, that I can't always just depend on him. Of course he's going to be there, but it's me that has to pick up the peices, to fight off the monsters, and make myself happy. And that is what I've did. He's here for me, but I helped beat that bastard away. I saved myself. I found the strength I've needed. And after everything...

I think the hardest thing that I've gone through his accepting the fact that I've fallen in love with my best friend. Sometimes, things just happen. Sometimes- you just have to go with the flow and trust that everything will work out in the end. They do say that love is worth the pain. So I guess I'd rather take a risk than never know because I'm undeniable in love with this man, and I don't want to shun my feeling for him. And really, I have no reason not to date him. [Other than there is a possibility we might mess with our friendship. But then again, we could get through that, and maybe we'd break up- but it'd never be messy....hopefully]

Love is worth it.
Gabe is worth it.
I'll get through this. [But I think I've already defeated it.]
And they always say, best friends make the best lovers.