The Angel of Death

“Mommy, can I go see daddy today?”

I hoped she would let me. I had been extra nice to her today; we made cookies and she seemed really happy. Maybe she would change her mind, just once.

“I’m sorry, sweetie. You know you can’t.”

I almost started crying, but I tried not to because then I would be acting like a little kid, which I wasn’t. I was almost five. I wasn’t a little kid anymore.

“Why not?”

“It’s too dangerous. I don’t want you to get hurt.”

I sobbed a little, so she walked over and picked me up. I never liked crying in front of her, but it wasn’t fair. I had never ever seen my dad. I had no idea what he looked like or sounded like or anything.

“Hey, don’t cry, Angel,” she said quietly, brushing away a few of my tears. I sniffled.

“I wanna see dad. Why can’t I?” I insisted. She sighed heavily.

“He’s evil.”

I gasped. I knew she didn’t really like him, but evil…

I didn’t want to believe it. My dad couldn’t be evil. He just couldn’t.

“He wouldn’t hurt me. I know it,” I told her, trying to calm down a little.

“Maybe not on purpose,” she muttered. I didn’t get it. “It’s just not a good idea. I told you already; it’s too dangerous there.”

“Why?”

“There are monsters everywhere, and it’s dark and you can’t see anything and there’s smoke all over the place.”

I was really scared now. “M-monsters?” She nodded, but I shook my head. “But Dad’s in charge there, right? He can make sure they don’t hurt me!”

“He can hardly control himself right now, sweetie,” she told me. “I doubt he can control anything else.” She looked me in the eyes. “Promise me you won’t try to go down there.”

“I promise,” I said slowly. I crossed my fingers behind my back. There was no way I was going to wait any longer. I had to see him. Mom put me down and I ran out of the kitchen. I almost ran into my uncle, Mikey, but I just missed him. He didn’t even notice me, but he started talking to Mom, so I stood right behind the wall and listened to them.

“Am I doing the right thing?” Mom asked. I was kinda surprised; she sounded even sadder than I was.

“Of course you are,” Mikey said. She sighed.

“It doesn’t seem right. I shouldn’t keep them apart; Gerard’s not a bad guy…”

“And you and I both know that. But right now it would be too dangerous to go near him. You just want to keep your son safe. Maybe later on, when he’s older-”

She shook her head. “I don’t know if he’s ever going to change. I can sense it; he has no control over what he does or how he acts…he’s like a wild animal…”

I was really confused now. If my dad wasn’t bad, why did Mom say he was evil? It didn’t make any sense. It was weird to hear her say his name for once. I wasn’t sure she’d ever said it before. I said it to myself. It felt kinda funny.

Mikey and my mom were still talking, so I ran outside and went to the very edge of the cloud. I looked down at that Earth place Mom was always talking about. It looked sorta like when I left a bowl of cereal out for too long; all the colors were swirly and mixed up. I was a little scared, but not much. I backed up a few feet, then ran forward and jumped.