Why Would He Believe in Me?

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I, I look but never touch.
She says I drink too much.
I only think about myself, sex, and the couch.
You. You light up my whole day.
Whenever you're away.
I'd love to say I've got you figured out.
No way.

If I get my hands on you, I would make you do all the things I want you to.
And bend your will to mine, never hear you whine.
Everybody break out.
It's enough to shout, it's enough to shout.
It's enough, yeah it's enough.

She's callin', we're brawlin'.
This is the hell that is my life.
I'm laughing, she's crying.
This is the hell that is my, hell that is my life.
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“Do you even know any of there people?” I yelled, trying to make Tom and Oliver hear me over the loud blaring music.

“Umm… She works in the café in town, and she was waiting for a bus…” Oliver states in reply, pointing to various people. All of BMTH, Shayleigh, Tom and I had spent the last week handing out flyers to the ‘going home’ party that we were throwing in the lodge. It was a terrible idea to throw it the day before we left, but that’s what day it was set for. And that day, was now.
I followed the two boys down the stair and into the kitchen, where they bother poured themselves, then me, drinks. I was hesitant, when id lived in Sheffield I’d drunk but I’d still been quite young so I never got drunk. Then, in America, it was all completely different and drinking was not such a big thing. All that said, I had nothing against alcohol, but also, I had no real experience.
Turns out, I am a true… LIGHTWEIGHT.

At midnight, I was heading for bed. My head was killing me and I was tired. If id managed to make it up to my bedroom, everything would have been fine, and that party, would of been crap.

“Hey, baby where you going?”

He makes me jump, and a spin round quickly, nearly falling down the stairs. He catch’s me in his arms and I try to free myself, but cant. I hate feeling helpless and out of control.

“Ah sorry-thanks-I’m…going” I mumble, jumbling it all out. I look up at him, and he seems to of understood. I look into his sad eyes. He’s pouting, that famous pout Tom had been capturing the other day for the bands new promo’s. I smile at him but he shakes his head.

“The nights not over yet. In fact, its just begging. Lets go and dance.” He pulls me back towards the music but I try desperately to hold my ground, clutching the banister tightly. He stops pulling and lets go, looking at me funny, hands on his hips, a mischievous look on his face. I think for a few moments before trying to make a run for it. Of corse, he’s to fast (or im to slow). His arms encage me and he carries me down the stairs. He puts me down and whispers in my ear.
“Turn around and lets dance. You don’t have to make this painful”. I fold my arms and shake my head. He decides to just wrap his arms around me. The music if loud, but the song is not fast. People shove and shimmy past us but I don’t acknowledge them, and they don’t acknowledge me. My body is stiff and my heart races. He carries on whispering into my ear.
“Phoenixx relax, you are so uptight around me. Im not gonna hurt you. I wont do anything ‘you’ don’t want. You’re a really great person. And I don’t meet many of those. Not people as genuine as you are. I cant help but be interested, you cant blame me. Im only human. But im trying to respect you, im being polite. I’ve even tried being romantic, a bit. Most other girls, by now I would of..well-you aren’t most other girls.”

He falls silent for a while, while I run what he’s saying over in my head. Then I turn to face him.
“Was that you trying to flatter me?”

“I dunno. A little bit. Im not into the whole full on flattery thing. It never seems to work, only boost’s ego.”

I laugh and nod.

“Why, would that of worked?”

“I depend what your trying to achieve.”

“Well I’ve got you to turn around, so that’s one thing. Im taking it step by step. For now, maybe a dance will do?”

“Okay, I guess you’ve earned that much.” I put my arms around his neck and he rest’s his on my hips. We sway. I look at the floor, embarrassed. I can see him looking at me, out of the corner of my eye. After a minute or so, he tightens his arms around me, closing the gap between us.

“This is nice” He grins.

“Mmm. But it means nothing.” I sigh quietly, making brief contact.

“I know…I know. But, maybe, this will,”

I look up, wondering what he means, and falling right into his trap.