This Is My Happy Ending

“Well, Miss Martins, according to the results, everything is fine.”, Dr. Jones told me.

It has been a week since I had woken up, and the relationship between me and “mom” had gone from weird and awkward to good. Gerard was still looking over-confident, and had tried kissing me twice. It was beginning to irritate me, and yeah, so he was too hot for my piece of mind, I wasn’t going to get involved with him.

“Does that mean I can go home now?”, I asked excitedly.

“Yes, anytime you want to.”, he replied with a smile.

“Finally.”, I sighed, throwing back the hospital bed covers and standing up carefully.

“Just go to the front desk before you leave so that they can check you out, all right? And if you start feeling bad, come to the hospital immediately, just in case.”, he said, shaking my mom’s hand before leaving the room.

“Get out.”, I say to Gerard, who stares at me in shock, his beautiful face filled with hurt.

“What’d I do?”, he asked, confused.

“I want to get dressed, idiot.”, I said, rolling my eyes.

I didn’t care if I was rude, it was the only way to keep me from falling in love with him, which wouldn’t work out at all. He grins and walks out, whistling a cheerful tune. I sigh and pull on the jeans and T-shirt they brought me. We walk to the front desk where one of the receptionists signed me out, and I see daylight again for the first time in months. I breathe in deeply, the smell of salt and sea tickling my nose.

“You’re beautiful.”, Gerard whispered when he helped me into the car.

I grimaced, ignoring his comment, and got in, slamming the door shut. His soft chuckle made me grind my teeth with frustration, and my hand itched to hit something. Had I always been this aggressive? We drove in silence, my head resting on my mom’s shoulder. I was already tired, just the small walk I had taken from my hospital room to the car had exhausted me. We turned in at a big driveway, leading to a picturesque house. It looked like something out of a fairytale with the plants creeping up the walls, the flowerbeds blooming. The roof was painted a bright red, and all the walls were an off-white. The big gates closed behind us, and the wooden front door opened. A small Golden Retriever puppy ran out, his fluffy ear flying behind him.

“She’s yours.”, Gerard said softly when I giggled at the cute dog.
“Really?”, I asked excitedly when we got out.

He nodded, and I flung my arms around his neck impulsively. He was hesitant before his own arms circled around my waist, hugging me tightly. I just realized exactly what I had done, and began squirming uncomfortably. He let go of me with a sigh. The small dog was staring up at me, her tongue lolling out of the side of her mouth. I bent down, opening my arms, and she ran to me, licking my face. She didn’t even know who I was, yet she was acting as if she had last seen me years ago.

“What’s your name, little doggie?”, I asked her, ruffling her ears while I stood up.

“We didn’t give her a name yet, she was delivered this morning. We thought we’d let you choose, seeing as it’s your dog.”, Gerard said as he helped my mother out of the car.

“I think I’ll call her Goldie.”, I said softly, and Goldie licked my face.

I giggled, and looked up at the house. It seemed vaguely familiar to me, but the memory stayed out of reach. I groaned with frustration, rubbing my temple with my free hand.

“Are you all right, dear?”, my mom asked worriedly.

“Yes, I’m fine. The house seems familiar, but the memory stays out of reach the whole time.”, I said with a sigh.

“Don’t push yourself, dear. Remember what Rick – I mean Dr. Jones had said.”, she said, blushing slightly.

My eyes narrowed as I studied her, and I noticed that her eyes were shining, along with the pink tainting her cheeks. She quickly walked to the front door where a butler was standing, waiting patiently for us to go into the house. I could feel Gerard’s eyes burning on my back as I walked in front of him, and walked quicker.

“Good morning, Miss Martins. Welcome back home.”, the butler said, and I smiled bewilderedly at him.

My mom was already halfway up the stairs, and I hurried to catch up with her, Goldie still in my arms. She started wriggling, and I put her down. She trotted along behind me, her cute pink tongue hanging out. My mom was standing in front of a closed door, waiting for me to catch up with her. I was panting by the time I had walked up all the stairs.

“You should take it more easy, dear.”, she reprimanded me.

“Okay. What’s in there?”, I asked curiously as Gerard joined us.

“Your room. Open it.”, he said softly.

I hesitated, hearing soft whispers coming from inside the room. Nameless people flashed into my mind, ten friends laughing together on a picnic blanket at the beach. I shook my head, trying to get rid of the image. All of the people looked familiar, but the same as with the memory of the house, it stayed out of my reach. I opened the door quickly when I heard the voices again, and it slammed against the wall.

“Surprise!!!”, a couple of people yelled, and I screamed in shock.

I stared at them blankly, and realized that these were the same people who had just flashed into my mind. This was creepy. Did I get some weird sixth sense or something? The girls were all crying silently, watching me. A tall guy with glasses and brown curly hair came slowly towards me, as if he was afraid that he will scare me off. I stared at him, and he came to stand right in front of me, still not saying anything.

“Shell, it’s me, Mikey. Remember?”, he asked softly, his hand touching my cheek gently.

Suddenly my mind whirled, vivid colors popping up in front of my eyes. A small girl with waist length brown hair and a curly haired boy playing at a park. The same two walking on the beach, talking and laughing. At a birthday party in silly costumes. Sitting on the floor, crying, the boy holding her. something seemed to go off in my head, and I burst into tears, flinging my arms around him.

“Mikey!”, I cried, his arms circling around me and hugging me tightly.

Behind me I could hear my mom bursting into tears, and the other people laughed, some of them sounding hysterical. Of course I remembered all of them, but there was still pieces missing. I just remember being in love with Gerard, but there’s where it stopped.

“Welcome back, Shell.”, he whispered in my ear before handing me to my other friends.

Bob, Ray and Frankie pulled me into tight hugs, twirling me around in the air. Chelsea, Irena and Kate hugged me as well, tears streaming down their faces. My eyes searched out the familiar ash blonde hair, and found her, standing behind the guys with just her head sticking out. I pulled away from my girl friends, and amber and I stared at each other. Her eyes were sparkling with tears, and I flung myself at her.

“Oh, Shell, I’ve missed you so much!”, she cried into my shoulder.

We hugged tightly, but something big was pressing against me. I pulled away from her, and looked down, and saw her big stomach. My eyes widened as I looked back up at her, and her face broke out into a brilliant smile.
“I’m pregnant!”, she cried happily, pulling me into a hug again.

“That’s great, Amber.”, I congratulated her.

I pulled away, searching for Frankie, who was staring at his wife with a loving smile on his face.

“Congratulations, soon-to-be father.”, I said to him with a smirk.

“Thanks, godmother.”, he said.

“Wait, what?”, I gasped, my head swiveling between the two of them.

Amber nodded vigorously, and Frankie smiled reassuringly.

“You’re godmother, Shell.”, Amber said.

“That’s – great.”, I said with a smile.

“All right, enough chit chat, let’s get this party going.”, Gerard said impatiently.

They laughed and filed out of the room. I went last, and hugged my mom tightly. Relief shone in her eyes, and I saw that she was burning to ask the questions she wanted to ask since the day I woke up.

“Later. Promise.”, I said softly.

She nodded with a smile, and went downstairs. I made to follow her, but felt a hand grab my arm, restraining me. I sighed, looking back and up into Gerard’s eyes.

“Do you remember everything that has happened between us?”, he asked urgently.

“No. I don’t remember anything that led up to me trying to kill myself. The last thing I remember is when I had realized that I’m in love with you. That’s all. Now let go of my arm.”, I said.

He let go reluctantly, and I walked down the stairs to the living room. I heard sniffling behind me, and looked back. Goldie was walking along behind me, her nose pressed against the ground. I whistled softly, and she looked up, her intelligent eyes sparkling in the overhead light. She trotted over to me, and stood on her hind legs for me to pick her up. I did that, and walked with her in my arms to the living room.

“It’s so great to have you back.”, Chelsea said after a few minutes of chatting.

“It’s great to be back. But I can’t remember anything further than the day I realized that I loved Gerard. Do you remember that day, Amber?”, I asked, turning to my friend.
The five of us were all sitting in a circle on the ground, with Goldie taking turns in licking us. The guys were watching a game on TV, drinking beers.

“Yes, of course I remember. You were so moody that day, how can I forget it?”, she asked with a smirk.

“So you don’t remember anything about –“, Irena started asking, but stopped dead when Amber glared at her.

“-about me and Kyle? No, I don’t. all I know about him is that we lived together, and that I – that I was expecting his child. Gerard told me that.”, I said quietly.

“You mean you were pregnant?”, Kate gasped, shock making her voice squeak.

“Shh! The guys mustn’t find out. And according to Gerard, that was what the doctor said. But when I get my full memory back, I’ll know, well, if I had known before the incident. But I don’t think I would have killed myself just to get rid of a child.”, I said softly.

“I remember you had asked me to let you know when they’re wedding was over. And then at the reception, your mom called me in tears, saying you had tried to kill yourself by walking in front of a truck. Gee didn’t hear until he and Thing came back from their hotel room. He had paled so badly, when I told him. I still remember every detail. That day was the most horrible of my entire life. He had left Thing just there, and rushed off to the hospital, with all of us going after him.”, Amber recalled, her expression far away.

“And everyone though I was going to die.”, I said.

“Yes. On the one hand I regret marrying without you there, but I also don’t regret it, because now I have our child growing inside of me. We’ll show you our wedding albums some time soon.”, she said, her face apologetic.

“It’s all right, Amber. I’m not mad.”, I said with a bright smile.

We sat talking for a few more hours, and all the time I could feel Gerard’s eyes burning on my back, but I didn’t look at him once. They went home when it was ten o’ clock, and my mom had told them that I needed to get some rest. She hasn’t changed at all. But she was just more overprotective now than ever.

“Aren’t you going home?”, I asked Gerard when all our friends had gone home.

“This is my home. Your mom had offered for me to come live here. She was alone, and I was alone and depressed, and we supported each other more the past eight months.”, he said quietly.

“Why did you marry her?”, I asked suddenly.

“Because I did love her, in a way. And I thought that you were happy with Kyle, and I didn’t want to take that away from you. In a way, Lynn-Z made me happy as well. But I know now that it never would have worked out. I’m just sorry that I didn’t realize it before I married her.”, he said, his voice filled with regret.

“When do you think will I get back the last few memories?”, I asked while we walked up the stairs.

“I don’t know. The doctor said maybe when you experience something familiar, and that obviously did the trick.”

“In the hospital – when the doctor said that thing about experiencing something familiar, I saw you look at my lips. Why did you do that?”, I asked, blushing furiously.

“I missed that so much. The color flaming in your cheeks. The only thing that made me sure that you were still alive was the heart monitor. You were barely breathing, and you had looked dead. I had looked at your lips, because if I kissed you, you would experience something familiar.”, he said, walking close to me.

“No. Don’t kiss me, Gerard. I don’t want those memories coming back. I’m too scared.”, I whispered, jumping out of his reach.

His shoulders sagged, and he walked to his room without another word. I walked to my mother’s room, and knocked softly.

“Come in.”, I heard her call, and opened the door, slipping inside.

“Hey mom.”, I greeted, sitting down on her bed.

“Hello darling.”

“Was I really pregnant?”, I asked softly, playing with a loose fray on the covers.

“Yes. Why - ”

“I can’t remember anything of that, mom. That part is just a big black hole. I’m going to bed. And thank you for tonight.”, I said, standing up quickly, and kissing her cheek before going to my own room.

I lay down on my bed, on the brink of falling asleep, my eyes half open and watching the moonlight spilling in through the open window, basking everything in an eerie glow. My eyelids drooped, feeling heavy.

I heard Goldie howling from somewhere in the house, and stood up, and walked softly down the hall, searching for her. I had noticed that she was very curious, sticking her nose in everywhere. I walked along the dark hall, straining my ears to make out where she was.

“Goldie!”, I called softly, hurrying.

My neck prickled uncomfortably, and I started feeling scared. I heard her howling above me, and my head snapped up to the ceiling. My brow furrowed in confusion.

“How the hell did she get into the attic?”, I grumbled under my breath.

There were a few rooms up there, and I knew the doors always stood open, but a gusty wind tended to come in from the high window. I hurried up the stairs, gasping for breath, and heard her scratching against one of the closed doors.

“I’m coming, honey.”, I called reassuringly to her, and heard her bark when she recognized my voice.

I slammed the door open, and she ran to me, jumping into my arms. The light suddenly flickered, along with a cold wind blowing in. I shivered, my neck prickling again. I heard feet scuffling, and whirled around, my eyes trying to see through the darkness. I was breathing heavily, fear constricting my throat.

“Who – who’s there?”, I called out, stumbling over the words.

I heard a voice whisper something, and ran to the door, clutching Goldie tightly in my arms. She had started howling softly, her small body shaking. I rattled the door, but it wouldn’t budge. Something moved over me, and I barely repressed the scream. I turned around, pressing my back against the wall.

“Shell, you killed our child.”, I heard the voice whisper, louder this time.

“Wh-what do you mean?”, I asked hesitantly.

“You killed our child.”, the voice whispered again.

“No. No I didn’t.”, I cried out, clutching the howling Goldie closer to my chest.

“Yes you did. You cold-bloodedly killed our child, and you will have to repay me.”

Goldie had stopped struggling and howling, and I looked down to make sure she was still okay. I screamed. There was no Goldie in my arms. It was the body of a dead baby, busy rotting, and blue. I let the thing fall out of my arms, and looked up, into a face, or rather, what was left of it. I screamed again. The face was blue, with parts of its face missing. There was a black hole where the one eye should have been, and a maggot crawled up into the nose. Brains were spilling out of the guy’s ears and mouth. He lowered his head as if to kiss me, and only then did I see the blade in his hand, the moonlight shining on it. I screamed again, and again, until my throat started hurting.

“Shell!”, I heard someone yell, shaking me roughly.

I continued thrashing, trying to get away from the arms that was holding me.

“No, no. I didn’t kill the baby. I didn’t kill the baby!”, I screamed.

Someone poured a cup of water out over me, and I sat bolt upright, my eyes flying open. Gerard was holding me tightly, my mom standing with an empty cup in her hands. I was shaking violently, drenched in sweat. They were staring at me, their faces filled with worry.

“I didn’t kill the baby.”, I whispered, over and over again.

“We know you didn’t kill the baby, honey.”, my mom said comfortingly.

“You should get back to bed, Mrs. Martins. I’ll stay with her.”, Gerard said softly, still holding me tightly.

“All right. Call me if you need me.”, she said softly before walking out, closing the door behind her.

“You’re safe.”, Gerard whispered against my hair, rocking me gently.

I clutched his shirt tightly, and stared up into his eyes. I could feel the water still dripping down my face, the image of the dead guy and baby still fresh in my mind.

“Where’s Goldie?”, I asked urgently.

“She’s in your bathroom. We had to close her in, she was trying to bite you, and growling at us when we tried to wake you up. Do you want me to go get her?”, he asked, stroking my hair.

I nodded, and he stood up, opening the door to my bathroom. Goldie was just a golden blur as she hurtled to my bed, and tried to jump up. I pulled her up and clutched her to my chest.

“Stay with me. Please.”, I pleaded when Gerard walked to my door.

He looked uncertain for a moment, but joined me on the bed anyway, pulling me down so that I was lying next to him. I lay with my back to him, still holding Goldie, and he put his arm around me, pulling me into his arms. I was still shivering, the hair on my neck standing up.

“Are you okay?”, he asked softly, and I nodded slightly, already close to sleeping.

“Just a dream. Just a dream.”, I whispered to myself.