Reflections

One week. I have been here for a full week, today being a tuesday. The best news I heard all week was something Alex told me. She came into my room to check up on me and told me I could go home tomorrow. Should I be excited? Here I had a friend. At home I had... nothing. I could have gone to a real mental institution to be treated as a guinea pig, no thanks. Frank was going to drive me to my place, supposedly my car was still at the bar I crashed at. Now free of my restraints, I sat cross legged on my bed and watched out the window. It was a gorgeous summer day. Heat filtered in through the open window. I sighed and ignored the voices bouncing around the inside of my skull. Thats all these new drugs did, numb my mind to the imaginary. Of course, they were still here around me but when they spoke if was as if they were on mute, It was so easy to ignore them now.

"Are you ready to go?" I turned around and saw Lauren standing in the doorway. Her long brown hair was loose and straight. Her brown eyes looked through glasses that fit her face well. I smiled at her.

"Yeah, I have nothing to pack." she smiled back.

"Alex said for you to stop by her office before you leave tomorrow to pick up your medication." I nodded in understanding.

"Do I need to come here for refills?" I asked.

"Yeah, drugstores wouldn't carry it." I nodded again.

"Thanks."

"No problem, bye."

"Bye." she slipped out the door and closed it quietly behind her. I suddenly felt lonely. I would be returning to my empty apartment tomorrow, my illusions were numbed away, and I had no friends besides Alex and Frank... maybe Lauren but they had lives. I'm unemployed and nearly forty. On top of it all, my wife left me years ago. I guess I never got over that either. She took our child away with her and I haven't seen them since. Fuck, I never even met my own kid! I bit my lip. Why was life so unfair? One thing happened and everything else came crashing down. I guess I never got over Mikey enough to move on.

Birds sang outside and life seemed so perfect. I opened my eyes to be blinded by the sun which was already high in the sky. I groaned and sat up. I looked around the plain hospital room and noticed and post-it note on the wall. I frowned and rolled out of bed. I pulled the note off the wall and read it.

'Tried not to wake you. Frank called and said he would be here around noon. When you wake up, come to my office where I have your clothes and a months worth of meds.'

Alex's name was signed at the bottom. I looked up at the clock and did something between a hiss and a gasp. It was noon! I spun around and bolted for the door. I jogged down the corridor earning glares from other doctors and nurses. I ran all the way to Alex's office and paused before knocking on her glass door. She looked up and smiled. She motioned me inside. I opened the door and shut it behind myself.

"Good, you got the note then?" she smiled warmly. She was hunched over a stack of paper work. She didn't seem the type to do her work but I guess I was wrong. She leaned back in her chair and reached over and pulled a pile of clothes was a white paper bag on the top off a table beside her and handed them to me.

"Is he here yet?" I asked nervously. I hope he hasn't been waiting long.

"Nope, called and said the traffic is murder... that was about twenty minutes ago. I'm guessing another half hour maybe?" I nodded and let out a sigh of relief. "Your clothes were washed by the way, No more vomit or beer."

"Thanks." I smiled,

"Wasn't me, Lauren had to do it. Our ward is so understaffed its fucked up." I laughed at her expression.

"What are your hours, its like you have been here very second." she rolled her eyes.

"Pretty much. Seven days a week and eight hours at least."

"Urgh." I groaned.

"I know eh, but the pay is decent." she smiled. "Go get changed, Frank will be here soon." I nodded and thanked her again before walking out of her office and over to the bathroom to changed. Boy, was I dying for a shower.