Hella Good Sandwiches

Jaime was dragging Mackenzie out of HGS, she kept shooting glances back towards Mike. Mike was intently staring at her and when her and Jaime disappeared out the door his stare turned to a glare and he turned to his brother.

"Fuck you! Why the fuck would you be that low?" He seethed. Clearly upset with Vic. I'm so fucking lost.

"You told Addy about the Eric incident! That's why." Vic shot right back. In two seconds I think they're going to probably fight each other.

"Addy, control your woman." Addy shot me a glare and Mike shot me a grin. "Mike, stop acting like a G and calm down. Now, will someone please tell me what the hell is going on. Seriously." I said throwing my hands in the air.

"For real, I'm so lost. Well, not about the Eric thing. What brought that up?" Tony interjected.

"Um well. Earlier at the apartment Jaime was going to tell me about something that happened between Vic and this guy Eric at summer camp." Addy started. "But then we decided to come prank you." I shot her my withering stare and she smiled and looked between me and Tony which made me smirk. "So, while you and Tony here were in the storage room, oww oww by the way... Vic said something as a joke to Mike so he told us about the summer camp incident, which I will tell you about later." Addy said letting out a few giggles and shot a look at the blushing Vic.

"Okay, I'm still not seeing how this affected Mike and Mac.." I said with confusion clearly laced in my voice.

"I'm getting to that." Addy stated. "Anyway, then to get back at Mike, Vic told us how he heard Mike moaning Mac's name the other night." Mike was scowling, looking at his crossed arms. I looked at Tony who, I'm guessing; had the same expression on his face as I did on mine.

"Right..." I drawled out of awkwardness. "Actually." I started. "That's not too hard to believe and I don't know why everyone's reacting the way they are. We ALL know Mac and Mike want each other, the sexual tension alone is enough to establish..." Was all I got out before Tony put his hand over my mouth.

"We know!" Vic, Addy and Tony all exclaimed looking at me.
I removed Tony's hand. "Sorry, it just seems like I'm the only one who has the balls to say it. And I don't even have balls." I said grinning at Mike who was slowly smiling. "Yo Whiskeydick, can I talk to you for a second in the backroom?" I quirked my head to the back and he shrugged.

"Can you stop calling me Whiskeydick though?" He asked walking towards the stock room.

"I could, but I'd rather not. It's my own personal affectionate name for you. Obviously. Besides Mike, it doesn't matter you have a small dick, all that matters is that you know how to use it. Oh and you have pretty long fingers. I'm sure that'll make Mac excited." I said pushing him through the door. I heard Addy and Tony start cracking up.

"Look." I said closing the store room door. "Do you honest to god like Mac-Z? Don't lie to me, I can spot liars so don't fuck with me." I said staring at him, with what I'm hoping was an intimidating stare. However, very unlikely because he's like a giant. Mike started fidgeting and looking from me to the door. "No one can hear us through the door, unless they have super hearing. Which trust me, they don't. I'm the one who has freakish hearing. If you just tell me the truth, I'll talk to Mac for you. She may act like she won't listen to me, but she will. Eventually." I said leaning up against one of the shelves.

"I'm...Attracted to Mac." Mike mumbled out. I rolled my eyes.

"If that's all you feel for Mac, then I'm going to tell her to stay away from you." I said pushing myself away from the counter. I headed towards the door when Mike spoke up.

"All right! Fuck. I like her, okay? I don't know, there's something about her. She doesn't buy my bullshit and no other girl has before. She sees through my pretensions and I dunno, she's just cool. Plus I really do want to fuck her." Classic fucking Mike.

"I love how you can be semi deep and say something like pretensions, by the way, props for knowing a big word like that," I said in a condescending tone. "then you can just go and say something like 'I want to fuck her.' You're a class act there Whiskeydick." I smiled patting his arm. He wrapped his arm around me and gave me a quick awkward hug and when I pulled away I couldn't help but to gape at him. "Holy fuck. Do you and Vic even eat?!"

"Where did that come from? Yes, we eat." Mike said, looking at me like I was nuts.

"Fucking Fuentarexic pedophiles." I muttered walking out of the backroom. Mike did his classic "Ah ha!" Pedo laugh and I exclaimed "Exactly my fucking point!" I walked backed into the main room of HGS and saw that Mac and Jaime had returned. I ran over and pounced on Mac. "Mac-Z! My lover!" She started laughing and gave me a hug.

"Sometimes, I seriously think you guys are lesbian's." Jaime announced staring between Mac and I. Both Mac and I shot Jaime a look and Addy backed away from us.

"I know that look! That look is not your friend!" Addy scampered away behind the counter and tugged Vic with her. I looked at Mac and she nodded so then we smiled really wide and turned towards Jaime and started walking to him.

"Well, if that isn't creepy I don't know what is." He said, his eyes darting between Mac-Z and I. We slowly nodded our heads, Jaime flipped and took off towards the door. We acted like we were going to follow but when he ran out the door we turned back around and started laughing.

"Jaime's so easy." Mac giggled. Everyone nodded in unison, Mac and Mike's eyes caught and I couldn't help but smile. I was definitely going to play match maker.

"I have three queries to ask. Query the first; are we doing anything tonight? Query the second; how fucking good am I looking right now? And finally, query the third; who's crashing at my place tonight?" I said in my best Guy Ripley impersonation. Addy and Mac, used to my shenanigans started laughing, the guys giving me quizzical looks. Except Tony... Oh no, Tony was giving me a mix between a smirk and his 40 watt smile. I raised my eyebrow at him and moved his head to the side. I bit my lip and he nodded. If you're acting like you don't know what's going on right now, you're totally lying.

"I was going to say I would crash tonight, but I'm pretty sure you and Tony are going to be a little preoccupied." Mac said, trying to keep a straight face.

"Oh, you know it." I replied back, taking Tony's hand in mine. Addy started doing the oww oww wow thing and I laughed. "Don't even act like you're not going to do something with you're pedofuenti tonight here Addy." Her and Vic blushed. Beat! Tony started leading me out the door and before it even shut his lips were attached to mine and I heard Mac yelling, "Use protection!" I flipped off the window with one hand and grabbed a hold of Tony's collar by the other. I love me some prank nights!