I'm Not Okay...I Promise

*Mikey: Gollstaff, you have entered the Door To The North. You are now by yourself, standing in a dark room. The pungeant stench of mildew emanates from the wet dungeon walls.
*Ray: Where are the Cheetos?!
Mikey: They're right next to you.
*Frank: I cast a spell!
Ray: Where's the Mountain Dew?!
Mikey: In the fridge. Duh!
Frank: I wanna cast a spell!
Ray: Can I have a Mountain Dew?!
Mikey: Yes, you can have a Mountain Dew! Just go get it!
Frank: I can cast any of these right? On the list?
Mikey: Yes, any-any of the First Level ones.
Ray: I' gonna get a soda! Anyone want one?! Hey Mike I'm not in the room right?!
Mikey: What room?!
Frank: I wanna cast Magic Mistle.
Ray: The room where he's casting all these spells from!
Mikey: He hasn't cast anything yet!
Frank: I am, though, if you'd listen. I'm casting Magic Mistle.
Mikey: Why are you casting Magic Mistle? There's nothing to attack here.
Frank: ...uh...I'm attacking the darkness!
*ALL LAUGH*
Mikey: Fine, fine. You attack the darkness. There's an elf infront of you.
Frank: Woah!!
*Gerard: That's me right?
Mikey: He's wearing a-a a brown tunic and he has grey hair and blue eyes.
Gerard: No, I don't. I have grey eyes.
Mikey: Let me see that sheet.
Gerard: Well it says I have- well it says I have blue eyes but I decided I wanted grey eyes.
Mikey: Whatever. Okay, you guys can talk to each other now. If you want.
Frank: ...hello?
Gerard: Hello.
Frank: I am Gollstaff: Sorcerer of Light!
Gerard: Then how come you had to cast Magic Mistiles?
*ALL LAUGH*-except Frank.
Mikey: Y-y-you guys are being attacked.
Ray: Do I see that happening?!
Mikey: No! You're outside. By the Tavern!
Ray: Cool! I get drunk!
Mikey: There are- there are seven ogres surrounding you.
Gerard: How can they surrond us? I had Mortancian's Magical Watchdog cast.
Mikey No you didn't.
Ray: I'm getting drunk! Are there any girls there?!
Gerard: I totally did! You asked me if I wanted any equipment before this adventue and I said "No, but I need material components for all my spells!" So I cast Mortancian's Fateful Watchdog!
Mikey: But you never actually cast it.
Ray: Roll the dice to see if I'm getting drunk!
Mikey: ...yeah, you are!
Ray: Are there any girls there?
Mikey: Yeah!
Gerard: I did though! I completely said, when you asked me-
Mikey: No you didn't! You didn't actually say that you were casting the spell! And now here's ogres! Okay?!
Ray: Ogres?! Man, I got an Ogre Slaying KnifeIt's got a plus nine against ogres!
Mikey: Your not there! Your getting dunk!
Ray: Okay, but if there are any girls there I wanna do them!