For the Last Night I Lie, Could I Lie With You?

Gerard’s POV

Have you noticed Tyler isn’t here today?

Bridgette wrote in music theory, sliding the note over to me.

Yeah. All his friends are gone too.

They probably got suspended. Or better…expelled.

I hope so.

Are we still meeting on Saturday?

As far as I know, yes.

Good I’m looking forward to it.

Me too.

How’s your head?

Still hurts like hvll, but I’m taking stuff for it.

Good…but remember you shouldn’t overdose.

I know.

And don’t mix with booze.

I know!

Just making sure you don’t try to hurt yourself.

Thanks.

How did she know what I was doing? Is it that obvious?

Yesterday when I got home I took some painkillers for my head. My dad asked me what I was doing, but I wouldn’t answer him. My dad scares the crap out of me. I managed to tell him I had a bad headache and he asked why I had a black eye. I didn’t tell him that I got in a fight and when I refused to talk he hit me. I ran into my room with the painkillers and locked the door.

I’ve thought about suicide before just because my life sucks. My mum is an alcoholic my dad is an alcoholic and a pot smoker. They hit me a lot and don’t let me have friends over or talk about having friends. I’ve never had a girlfriend either. I’ve been stripped of my teenage freedoms and now I thought it was time to end it.

I sat on my bed and poured 10 pills onto my mattress. I dug a few bottles of beer out from under my bed frame and put them there too. I took three pills and swallowed them, rinsing with the booze. I didn’t feel good at all and my mind was beginning to race at an obnoxious speed.

I thought of all the pain I’d been through in my 16 years of existence. Then… I thought of Bridgette and how she’d the only person that has really wanted to talk to me and be my friend. I thought about the plans we’d made for this weekend at the library. I thought of all the times she’s stood up for me against the bullies and stayed by my side even when she was hurt.

I brushed the pills back into the bottle and threw all the beer bottles out the window into the back yard. I wasn’t going to kill myself now. Maybe later…but not now.