So...Who Are You Again? My Chemical Romance? Never Heard of You.

A knock came on the door, but I chose not to acknowledge the person. I continued lying in the bunk I eventually got to that I had hopes of maybe sleeping this feeling off. The door opened, letting in uninvited light and a curious Shelly. She frowned when she caught sight of me, staring up at the bottom of the bunk above me.

"Wow, Julie, you look bad," she commented, which only lifted my spirits even higher. "I thought you were going to sleep."

I chose not to answer, and just continue looking at the bunk. It wasn't that interesting and there was a rather large split through the wood. I'd been staring at that stupid piece of wood for hours, and it had actually gotten to a point that it was imprinted in my vision when I blinked.

"You dead or what?" she mumbled, kneeling on the ground next to my temporary bed. After not getting a response again, she waved a hand in front of my face, to which I only sighed, just to let her know I was still, in fact, of the living. She smiled approvingly then stretched her leg out to shove the door shut with her foot.

"We're almost to Atlanta," Shelly said, "so I want to ask you about something while you can't leave."

As if I was going anywhere.

"I'm all ears," I said boredly, rolling onto my side to face her but not bothering to lift my head. She narrowed her eyes thoughtfully as she analyzed my appearance.

"I want to know what's up with you and Frank."

"Nothing is up with me and Frank," I replied in a monotone, actually speaking the truth.

"No seriously," she insisted, leaning forward to urge me to open up. "Tell me. I never want to see that look on your face again."

"If that's a crack at how bad I look right now, I swear-"

"No," she replied, genuinely looking concerned, and continued in a soft voice, "When you were looking at that phone you looked absolutely heart broken. Why was that? What do you know that I don't?"

I continued looking at her concerned face, and I knew she cared. She was a blabbermouth, so I was still reluctant to tell her anything, but at this point, I was tired of doing this by myself. Frank wasn't on my side anymore, leaving me pretty much alone in the matter.

"You can't tell anyone this," I informed seriously, to which she nodded her head. I didn't know why I was still defending him. He seemed to be lieing to and deceiving everyone, caught up in his own world of who he'd told lies to, and yet I still wanted to protect him. Damn my compasionate nature.

I let out a short breath, not really feeling anything anymore, just like my wish. The pain had gone away some time ago, morphing into, quite simply, a void of nothingness.

So, I unleashed the surprisingly long tale of Frank and I. I started with when Frank finally told me why he was so mad at that Stop N Go and about how that led me to abandon them after the show the next week to go talk to him. I told her about our two hour conversation that rarely had silence, and how that was the first time I'd heard him laugh. I told her about my adventures when I stayed in the same hotel room with Gerard and Frank which eventually led me to today- This morning.

I noticed Shelly was began smiling when I described our escapade outside the hotel, which suddenly reminded me of myself. I had a flashback to when I listened to Frank's story, which kind of sat uneasily in the back of my mind. But I prevailed, telling each scene, details and feelings included so there'd be no confusion.

Once I had said everything out loud, it sounded unbelievable. If this were The Truman Show, I kindly ask the producers to stop picking through unused skits from Days of Our Lives.

"Then that leads us to this very moment where I've been rotting for the past some odd hours," I concluded, my voice feeling dry from talking so much. I didn't know why I remembered certain details about Frank or what he was doing, but I felt the need to add them into my mini-autobiography. Might as well, I figured.

"That's a whole lot of nothing," Shelly commented after a couple seconds of processing. "How did all that happen without my knowledge?"

"Now who's the unobservant one?" I mumbled.

"Yeah, yeah," she waved off. "But damn- You've had a very hectic few weeks. I'm totally not used to this. It's actually kind of...fun." She cocked her head with a thoughtful look as I furrowed my eyebrows.

"That wouldn't be the word I used to describe it."

"Well from the outside looking in."

"You're still in this too," I reminded. "Just more pushed to the side. I'm in the dead center- Like the eye of the storm."

"Isn't the eye of the storm calm?"

"So you did learn something in high school," I mused, cracking a smirk.

"I saw it on the TV in the breakfast room this morning," she admitted, trying to repress a laugh. "It's kind of ironic that came up."

"Sure," I whispered, not feeling like joking around.

"It sounds like you've fallen pretty hard for this guy, Julie," she commented, glancing at me slyly.

"What?" I scoffed, lifting my head to look at her strangely.

"Ah finally, a reaction." She smirked, while I frowned, placing my head back on the pillow. "I have an idea," Shelly offered, holding my attention. "I'll go have a little chat with Frankie-Poo if you straighten things out with Gerard."

"What could you possibly have to say to Frankie-Poo?"

"I have a lot to say if his intentions were to hurt you. That bastard won't know what hit him."

"You don't have to. Actually- I don't want you to," I corrected, shaking my head. She didn't need to get involved, and I sure as hell didn't need her saying anything I didn't want her to. "But I'll talk to Gerard, don't worry."

After a couple more minutes of talking, the bus came to a stop. We rejoined the guys just in time to unload and settle into the hotel. Shelly told me that everyone for the most part made up with each other, except Frank. She said Gerard tried profusely to apologize for his behavior that led to several bruises on Frank which he accepted, but his attitude suggested otherwise. Shelly told me everyone was concerned about me, but she simply told them I was tired, which I guess was a sufficient enough excuse for them to accept.

As we walked to the hotel, weighed down with all our luggage, I felt a distance between Frank and the rest of us, just like day one. He walked about five feet behind the rest of us with his hands shoved in his pockets and his head down, looking to be in deep thought. I subconsciously slowed down as I kept nonchalantly glancing back, and soon I fell behind the others too.

I suddenly realized what I was doing and got my legs working again to catch up. Whether I wanted to admit it or not, I was naturally just drawn to Frank, which was going to make things difficult. I just had to keep reminding myself, almost willing myself, not to talk to him. As we waited for the elevator, Frank passed us, causing a few heads to turn.

"Frank, the elevator's right here," Ray informed, pointing to the large silver doors in front of us.

"I'll take the stairs," Frank replied, not turning around.

"Fine. Don't reap the benefits of modern technology," Ray mumbled to himself, shaking his head. An obnoxious dinging sounded repeatedly, telling us our lift had arrived. I didn't spare a glance at him as I entered the elevator, I couldn't bring myself to.

--

I didn't talk to Frank until a about week later. It was strange and felt exactly like the very first week again, except worse because I knew he was specifically trying to avoid me, rather than adapting to my presence like before. I wanted to talk to him, but at the same time, I didn't. Besides, even if I did miraculously gain will power from my complementary hotel breakfast every morning, I wouldn't have even known where to find him at. I didn't watch My Chemical Romance's performances that entire week either, so it really felt like he had gotten deleted from my life. Select, right click, deleted.

Despite his absence, my mind still wondered about him until I came to a conclusion- In some strange way, I felt it was for the better. Maybe we should have kept our first impressions of each other and just left it at that. But I got nosy and just had to talk to him. I sometimes regret it and then in a fit of annoyance, I decide I don't. Frank was a truly unique individual; I just wish I had known what went wrong.

I thought about this almost every night for some reason, and it was kind of getting irritating. The lack of sleep I'd get over such stupid thoughts was taking a toll on me, but I insisted I was fine. I'd formed a habit of walking around outside the hotel we were at during strange hours in the mornings. I couldn't sleep so it was a waste to just lie there, listening to the other people in the room snore, and loudly I might mention.

So at 5:14 in the morning on the 15th, a little over a week after my excursions, I lost my patience with sleeping and got up. It was halfway through August so the weather hadn't turned too chilly yet. Walking around alone in a strange area (In New York, I might mention) probably wasn't the best idea, but nothing had happened to me so far.

All of the sudden, I heard rustles a little ways away from me, making me freeze. The hairs on the back of my neck rose as my eyes widened as my eyes darted around me, trying to find the source of the noise. I could see a figure, but I had to strain my eyes due to the lack of light around in order to see.

Before I could leave, which probably would have been the best option, my mind went blank from all thought when I recognized the figure. He stopped as well upon noticing me and we both stared at each other, speechless for several moments. My mouth opened to say something, but I couldn't think of anything, so I simply remained standing.

"Hey Julie," the man said awkwardly, still looking at me as if in a trance.

"Hey Frank," I replied robotically. And that's where our conversation ended. Neither of us continued, even though there were at least a million and one things to be said- One for instance being why either of us was even out here at this hour. We just stared at each other, both of us holding onto our secret unhappiness and I think in those few moments we figured out something. We both still wanted to be near each other- We both still needed each other.

Breaking eye contact for the first time, Frank averted his eyes to the ground, but his expression remained the same, a dim light falling on his face causing deep shadows. He took a solemn, deep breath and his posture hunched slightly.

"Is this how it's going to be the rest of the tour?" I uttered softly, deciding I'd better talk to him while he was here. Frank's eyes glanced back up to mine as he remained silent, thinking over my question. He blinked slowly before finally opening his pursed lips.

"What do you mean?" It had been exactly ten days since I'd heard his voice, but it didn't sound like I remembered it. It sounded heavy and full of burden, very unlike anytime I'd heard him talk.

"Something broke between us," I said, not sure if he'd know what I meant. He wasn't exactly a deep guy.

"Broke?" he repeated in question.

"Look at us- A stranger could see there was something wrong," I explained, trying to find the right words, with a short scoff then shook my head. "So, what's wrong with us?"

"I don't know," he mumbled with a small shrug. "Gerard's always been better at analysing than me."

Taken aback, I furrowed my eyebrows and retracted my head, side glancing at him unsurely.

"What's Gerard got to do with anything?"

"Gerard can be incorporated into any conversation- It's one of his great," he paused shortly to think, "qualities...among other things."

"Like what?"

"Oh haven't you heard?" His eyebrows shot up as he spoke, his tone was forceful and bitter. "He's charming and funny and have you heard his laugh? It's a-freaking-dorable!"

"What in the hell are you talking about?" I raised my voice, growing impatient with him dancing around his point.

"Gerard! Duh!" he exclaimed, obviously faking enthusiasm. "Don't cha want to talk about Gerard?"

"Not really," I answered back, still annoyed. "But you obviously do."

"Aw, come on Julie, I can't have him all to myself forever. He's yours now, don't be so modest," he replied snidely, sounding like someone completely unlike himself. "But I have to wonder- What do you two do when everyone else isn't looking?"

"You think- Me and Gerard-" I sputtered, actually starting to laugh a little. Frank frowned, not finding his words to be funny.

"Well I saw you making out with him some time last week." He threw his arm in the air, direction in some general direction of Gerard.

"That was one kiss and it was an accident," I explained with a scowl.

"How do you accidently kiss someone?" he questioned, looking at be unbelievably. I rolled my eyes with a sigh then clicked my tongue. Who knew one freaking kiss could cause so much damage? It was like World War III...except just in Wantagh, New York.

"It's hard to explain. But I don't like him that way, I already talked to him about it. We're not together or anything."

"Oh," was all Frank said as he watched me apprehensively, the anger seeming to go away. He bowed his head to the ground and blinked several times. I had finally talked to Gerard just a few days ago, telling him how I felt. He looked disappointed, but admitted he was expecting it. It was a short conversation since he claimed to have to go somewhere; I tried with all my might to believe him, but deep down I knew I hurt him. And for that I felt horrible, despite his repeated assurences he was fine.

"Yeah," I stated, letting myself feel hostility toward Frank. The sadness I'd felt initially boiled into rising anger.

"So you're telling me you don't like him?" he restated, his voice stripped of all resentment.

Ding, ding, ding- We have a winner.

"No we're getting married," I contradicted sarcastically, making him chuckle.

"Oh how I've missed you," he said with a playful smile. He took a step forward and raised his arms to hug me, but I crossed my arms instead. He stopped abruptly, looking at me confused.

"You should go hug Lauren," I muttered, not looking him in the eye, but I could see his face grew grim again as his arms fell to his sides. "Since you two are all fine and dandy now."

"That wasn't Lauren on the phone," he spoke softly, making my head snap in his direction with wide eyes.

"What?" I asked loudly, not sure if I heard him right.

"That was my friend Tom," he explained, looking ashamed. "I deleted Lauren's number but I changed Tom's name on my phone to her's for if Gerard went through my calls because he has no value of possession when he wants to figure something out. I panicked whenever he was interrogating us and that was the first thing I thought to tell him."

"S-Seriously?" I stuttered, only able to force out one word. After hearing his words, I practically felt my heart jump, abandoning the unbelievable amount of weight that had burdened itself upon me.

"No we're getting married," Frank mimicked, scrunching his nose in a teasing manner. I laughed, not just at his joke, but simply because I was more than happy to be proved wrong about this.

"You were so convincing," I breathed, staring at him in amazement. "You completely had me fooled!" I shoved him forcefully in the shoulder, making him laugh as he rubbed the place gingerly.

"Hey, hey, that's where Gerard punched me," he said, still smiling, then added shortly after, "But I guess I deserved that. I felt absolutely horrible after I saw your reaction. I'm a jerk for that and I know it...And if it makes you feel any better, my lie didn't work out that well- We're not even gonna be in New Jersey until two weeks."

"So why didn't you just tell everyone what really happened?" I really wanted the truth to be out there because all the conflicts that have arisen came from misinterpretations, and I was kind of getting sick of it. I didn't think this kind of stuff happened in real life, but lo and behold...

"I don't know. I was just all discombobulated from that morning. I woke up early, I got attacked, and I walked in on you and...Gerard." Frank seemed to hold a certain disdain in his words when talking about Gerard.

"Why did it bother you so much?" I wondered quietly. "Why's all your anger focused on Gerard?"

"'Cause," he began seriously but then cracked a smile. "You're mine forever, and I'm not about to share you."

I grinned as he slung his arm around my shoulders, leading me away from where we had stood. I found amusement out of his joking gesture, but I kind of wanted a real answer instead.

"So if I'm yours forever, then where have you been the past week?"

"I was thinking," he shrugged off and I could tell that wasn't all. Whatever it was, he obviously didn't want me knowing...which only made me want to.

"About?" I pressed on. So many questions and even some answers needed answers.

"About whether the carpet I bought would match my drapes."

"Ah the exciting life of Frank Iero." My eyebrows rose in amusement. "What will he do next, ladies and gentlemen?"

"You don't even know, babe." He scoffed, shaking his head, certainly not thinking about his home decor. I didn't pursue the matter anymore- I really didn't feel like finding reasons to be mad at Frank.

We continued walking around the low lit area a few more seconds in silence before we came across a large tree. All it took was a simple glance and, without a word, we collapsed against the tree and enjoyed lost company. His arm was still lazily slung around me and I leaned my weight into him, feeling quite comfortable. If anything, Frank was a good pillow.

"So are we good?" Frank asked suddenly, looking at the darkened open lawn before us. I thought for a second, remembering the anguish I felt before and deciding if I should really just let him off the hook like that. I pulled myself away to look at him with a contemplative look.

"Ow!" he exclaimed after I punched him again in the other shoulder.

"Now we're good," I replied with a smile, nestling myself against Frank again. "You know, we're not really good at being friends. Seems like every week, hell maybe even every day, we have a different view of each other."

"I like being your friend- It's a good challenge."

"What? Like, you have to TRY and tolerate me?"

"No. I'm willing to keep trying with you when something happens. I don't know why. These conflicting friendships usually piss me off, but I like that feeling after we talk things out. I feel-" He stopped short.

He couldn't do that- I was just getting to what he was saying! That's like getting someone's attention then saying, "Never mind."

"Eh, nothing," he mumbled, deciding against finishing his thought. His train of thought seemed really butchered throughout the conversation. What I would give to know what that boy was thinking- It'd be my luck though that he actually was thinking about carpets and drapes.

I closed my eyes, letting the silence settle and I felt him let out a breath of air. I hoped he didn't have anywhere to go at 5 in the morning because I was comfortable and content- There was no way I was getting up. Soon, I heard a soft snore, and giggled when I noticed Frank had fallen asleep. I guess he wasn't getting up either.

I closed my eyes peacefully, forgetting everything but that moment and for the first time in about a week that I was able to drift into a much appreciated slumber.