Am I More Than You Bargained for Yet?
Chapter Nine
Chapter Nine
I woke up suddenly. I had no idea what the time was but I was guessing it was late, since it was pitch black outside. I turned over and tried to go back to sleep but I couldn’t. I tried for about ten more minutes before giving up. I got out of bed and grabbed my CD case. I walked down the stairs, taking my duvet cover with me.
I flicked on the light of the lounge fast so that I knew where to walk to find the stereo before quickly flickering it off. I hated turning the light on when my eyes had gotten used to the darkness. It made me see all sorts of different colors…and it hurt. I walked toward the stereo and felt a sharp pain in my toe.
“Shit!” I whisper screamed before reaching down to see what I had hit…The coffee table. Damn thing. I walked around it and searched for the stereo.
Finally I found it and saw it was a ten disc changer. I smiled and loaded some of my burned CDs inside of it. I never had enough money to buy CDs so Britt always burned me some. I made sure the volume was low before grabbing the remote and going to the couch and getting comfortable.
I pressed the play button and ‘Bohemian Rhapsody' by Queen came on. I smiled probably the most genuine smile I had ever smiled in months. I mouthed the words and relaxed on the couch. I loved this song…and so did my mother.
Is this the real life?
Is this just fantasy?
Caught In a landslide,
Oh, escape from reality.
Even though she had hated me, there were times where she was happy I was around. I remember when she broke up with one of her boyfriends, Matthew, she was so upset.
Open your eyes
Look up to the skies and see-
I’m just a poor boy,
I need no sympathy...
Because I’m easy come, easy go,
A little high, little low,
Any way the wind blows
Doesn’t really matter to me,
To me.
I think she was really happy when he was around. She was just sitting there on the couch with tears in her eyes, hugging her knees.
Mama, just killed a man,
Put a gun against his head,
Pulled my trigger, now he’s dead,
Mama, life had just begun...
But now I’ve gone and thrown it all away.
Mama oooh,
Didn’t mean to make you cry-
If I’m not back again this time tomorrow
Carry on, carry on, as if nothing really matters.
I stood there with a curious look on my face. I was only five and this was the first time I had seen her so upset. I hid behind the door, making sure she couldn’t see me.
Too late, my time has come,
Sends shivers down my spine-
Body’s aching all the time,
Goodbye, everybody, I’ve got to go,
Gotta leave you all behind and face the truth.
Mama oooh (any way the wind blows)
I don’t want to die,
I sometimes wish I'd never been born at all...
Suddenly I had a tickling sensation in my nose. I wrinkled it but couldn’t help it. I sneezed…and quite loudly. She looked toward the door and saw me.
I see a little silhouetto of a man,
Scaramouche, Scaramouche will you do the fandango-
Thunderbolt and lightning. Very very frightening me-
Galileo, Galileo,
Galileo Galileo
Galileo figaro-magnifico-
But I’m just a poor boy and nobody loves me,
He’s just a poor boy from a poor family.
Spare him his life from this monstrosity...
I remember it so clear, even though I was so young. She was glaring at me, as if I was the most ugly thing in the world…and, so suddenly, her eyes were filled with love.
Easy come easy go, will you let me go?
Bismillah! No, we will not let you go, let him go.
Bismillah! We will not let you go, let him go.
Bismillah! We will not let you go, let me go.
Will not let you go, let me go.
Will not let you go, let me go
No,no,no,no,no,no,no...
Mama mia, Mama mia, Mama mia let me go,
Beelzebub has a devil put aside for me,
For me, For me...
“Come here, baby girl.” She said. I nodded, walked to the couch, and sat next to her.
“You're all I have left.” She whispered, giving me a hug. I hugged back, happy she was hugging me like other mothers hugged their children.
So you think you can stone me and spit in my eye,
So you think you can love me and leave me to die.
Oh baby, can't do this to me, baby,
Just gotta get out, just gotta get right outta here...
We just sat there, enjoying each other’s company. I felt myself getting drowsy. I wiped my eyes to find that they were wet. I was crying. I missed her so much.
Nothing really matters,
Anyone can see,
Nothing really matters. Nothing really matters to me,
Any way the wind blows....
I woke up suddenly. I had no idea what the time was but I was guessing it was late, since it was pitch black outside. I turned over and tried to go back to sleep but I couldn’t. I tried for about ten more minutes before giving up. I got out of bed and grabbed my CD case. I walked down the stairs, taking my duvet cover with me.
I flicked on the light of the lounge fast so that I knew where to walk to find the stereo before quickly flickering it off. I hated turning the light on when my eyes had gotten used to the darkness. It made me see all sorts of different colors…and it hurt. I walked toward the stereo and felt a sharp pain in my toe.
“Shit!” I whisper screamed before reaching down to see what I had hit…The coffee table. Damn thing. I walked around it and searched for the stereo.
Finally I found it and saw it was a ten disc changer. I smiled and loaded some of my burned CDs inside of it. I never had enough money to buy CDs so Britt always burned me some. I made sure the volume was low before grabbing the remote and going to the couch and getting comfortable.
I pressed the play button and ‘Bohemian Rhapsody' by Queen came on. I smiled probably the most genuine smile I had ever smiled in months. I mouthed the words and relaxed on the couch. I loved this song…and so did my mother.
Is this the real life?
Is this just fantasy?
Caught In a landslide,
Oh, escape from reality.
Even though she had hated me, there were times where she was happy I was around. I remember when she broke up with one of her boyfriends, Matthew, she was so upset.
Open your eyes
Look up to the skies and see-
I’m just a poor boy,
I need no sympathy...
Because I’m easy come, easy go,
A little high, little low,
Any way the wind blows
Doesn’t really matter to me,
To me.
I think she was really happy when he was around. She was just sitting there on the couch with tears in her eyes, hugging her knees.
Mama, just killed a man,
Put a gun against his head,
Pulled my trigger, now he’s dead,
Mama, life had just begun...
But now I’ve gone and thrown it all away.
Mama oooh,
Didn’t mean to make you cry-
If I’m not back again this time tomorrow
Carry on, carry on, as if nothing really matters.
I stood there with a curious look on my face. I was only five and this was the first time I had seen her so upset. I hid behind the door, making sure she couldn’t see me.
Too late, my time has come,
Sends shivers down my spine-
Body’s aching all the time,
Goodbye, everybody, I’ve got to go,
Gotta leave you all behind and face the truth.
Mama oooh (any way the wind blows)
I don’t want to die,
I sometimes wish I'd never been born at all...
Suddenly I had a tickling sensation in my nose. I wrinkled it but couldn’t help it. I sneezed…and quite loudly. She looked toward the door and saw me.
I see a little silhouetto of a man,
Scaramouche, Scaramouche will you do the fandango-
Thunderbolt and lightning. Very very frightening me-
Galileo, Galileo,
Galileo Galileo
Galileo figaro-magnifico-
But I’m just a poor boy and nobody loves me,
He’s just a poor boy from a poor family.
Spare him his life from this monstrosity...
I remember it so clear, even though I was so young. She was glaring at me, as if I was the most ugly thing in the world…and, so suddenly, her eyes were filled with love.
Easy come easy go, will you let me go?
Bismillah! No, we will not let you go, let him go.
Bismillah! We will not let you go, let him go.
Bismillah! We will not let you go, let me go.
Will not let you go, let me go.
Will not let you go, let me go
No,no,no,no,no,no,no...
Mama mia, Mama mia, Mama mia let me go,
Beelzebub has a devil put aside for me,
For me, For me...
“Come here, baby girl.” She said. I nodded, walked to the couch, and sat next to her.
“You're all I have left.” She whispered, giving me a hug. I hugged back, happy she was hugging me like other mothers hugged their children.
So you think you can stone me and spit in my eye,
So you think you can love me and leave me to die.
Oh baby, can't do this to me, baby,
Just gotta get out, just gotta get right outta here...
We just sat there, enjoying each other’s company. I felt myself getting drowsy. I wiped my eyes to find that they were wet. I was crying. I missed her so much.
Nothing really matters,
Anyone can see,
Nothing really matters. Nothing really matters to me,
Any way the wind blows....