Dirty Little Secret

*POV Switch*

I let out a small moan as I gain consciousness, instantly wishing that I was asleep again; my head is killing me. I wonder how much I drank last night; and how much of a fool I made out of myself. I can’t remember a single thing after my fifth or sixth drink. With my luck I probably broke out in drunken song and dance.

I open my eyes and see Zacky’s sleeping face. My eyes grow wide; I sit up and realize that I’m not wearing any clothes. I didn’t. Did I?

I clutch the comforter close to my body and look at the man next to me. I watch him as he begins to stir and his eyes flutter open. I’m momentarily mesmerized by his green eyes; but remember that there are more important matters at hand, like finding out if we did anything I should be regretting.

“Morning,” he says groggily, apparently unsurprised to find me in his bed.

“Morning,” I reply, a slight tinge of panic in my voice.

“What’s wrong?” He sits up, scratching his head.

“This may sound odd, Zacky, but are you wearing any clothes?”

He processes my question and shakes his head.

“Did we?”

*POV Switch*

She looks at me with sheer panic in her eyes and I realize that I fucked up last night. I had taken advantage of her. The one thing that I was trying to protect her from ended up being the one thing I did myself.

“Did we?” She asks again, her voice almost going up an entire octave.

“I don’t know,” I reply, trying my best to act like I have no clue. “Are you wearing any clothes?”

She shakes her head and looks like she’s on the verge of tears.

“Then I guess we did.”

She nods her head, biting her lip. “Any idea if we used protection?”

I look over to my nightstand and find the wrapper to one of the condoms we used, holding it up. “Apparently. At least we were safe idiots.”

“Yeah…”

I reach down to the floor for my boxer briefs and put them on under the covers. I get up, put on my jeans from last night and grab my head, acting like it’s killing me.

“I’m going to get some Tylenol, do you need any?” I ask, knowing very well she needs it.

“Yes, please.”

“I’ll be back in a few.”

I walk to the bathroom and get the Tylenol from my medicine cabinet. I stare at myself in the mirror and shake my head.

What was I thinking last night? I should have known that she’d regret sleeping with me. I’m not exactly Prince Charming or any shit like that. And she was drunk off her ass. Why did I do something so fucking stupid?

I continue to kick myself as I make it back to my room, Tylenol and water in hand. She dressed while I was gone and is holding her head in her hands when I enter.

“Here,” I say, handing her the glass and pills.

“Thanks.” She takes them from me and pops the pills into her mouth. “Do these things always suck this bad?”

“It depends, does your head feel like it has been split in two and you just want to cut it off so the pain will stop?”

“Yes.”

“That sounds about right. I hate to tell you, but they’re going to be like that most of the time. I have learned not to drink enough to get me hung over, but I failed to remember that last night.” I sit down next to her.

She looks over at my nightstand and stares.

“What’s wrong?” I ask; trying to see what caught her attention.

“There’s more than one.”

“What?”

She reaches over and grabs the wrappers. “We used more than one.”

“Oh… I guess so.”

“Two…” She sighs. “This really sucks.”

I try not to let it show that she’s hurting my ego.

She looks at me and shakes her head. “No, I didn’t mean for it to sound like that. I mean… This whole fucked up situation sucks. What Chuck did to me, what Gena did to you, this hangover, and neither of us remembering sleeping together.”

“It’s not like you’d want to remember that.”

She shrugs.

“It probably wasn’t any good anyway.”

“Why do you say that?” she asks.

“Drunken sex, it’s not that great most of the time.”

“I’ve heard about that. Guys don’t perform very well. But that didn’t look like a problem for you,” she says, holding up the condom wrappers.

“Guess I was lucky last night.”

She snickers. “Yeah…”

I look at the clock and realize how late it is. “You should probably call somebody. I’m sure they’re worried sick about you.”

She sighs. “Yeah…” She turns her phone on and shakes her head. “I’ve got some messages.” She scoffs as she listens to them. “Whatever…” She dials a number and waits for someone to pick up. “Pierre? Yes, I’m fine. I just needed to clear my head. I decided to stay over at a friend’s house. I should be there in about forty-five minutes, okay? See you in a bit. Bye.”

“Was he pissed?”

“Pierre was just glad I’m okay. However, I have made them late for just about everything. I’m going to call a cab; thanks for letting me stay over and stuff, even though we ended up being stupid.”

“I’ll drive you. There’s no point in wasting your money on a cab.”

“But you’ve got a hangover.”

“I’ve had worse. Don’t worry, it’s okay. I can take you.”

“Thanks.”

*POV Switch*

I scan through radio stations, trying to find something to listen to. Paramore’s “Crushcrushcrush” is playing and I don’t know why, but I feel like I listened to this last night.

“Do you remember me doing anything to this song last night?” I ask Zacky.

He takes a moment to listen to it. “I think you sang it.”

“I was afraid I did.”

“What’s wrong?”

“I was afraid that I did an embarrassing song and dance at the bar last night. If you remember me singing this then I must have.”

“Don’t worry; I think it was just you and me when you sang.”

“Well that’s a relief.”

“You’re remembering last night?”

“Not really. This song just kinda triggered something in my head.”

He nods his head and continues driving. I decide to give up on my quest for the perfect station and leave the radio alone. I look out the window at the passing scenery. California’s always been such a beautiful place. It’s one of my favorite places to be when I tour with Simple Plan.

My eyes drift over to Zacky and I can’t help but stare at him for a moment. Maybe it’s the hangover clouding my judgment, but he’s rather handsome. I wonder why I’ve never noticed this before…

He turns to face me and I’m drawn in by his beautiful green eyes.

“Uh, where were you staying? All I know is that you were in Long Beach.”

I tell him the hotel the guys are at and mention to drop me off in the parking lot so the guys don’t see him. It’s not like I’m ashamed to be seen with him or anything, I just don’t want the guys to think anything happened… Even though something did. Zacky doesn’t seem to mind my request and focuses on the road.

We arrive at the hotel and he finds a spot to park.

He turns to me and smirks. “I guess this is goodbye.”

A twinge of sadness hits me. “Yeah…” I lean over and give him and hug. “Thanks for everything, Zacky. You’re the best. I mean it.”

He smiles. “Well it was no problem. I’m just sorry things didn’t--”

“It’s okay. Neither of us was thinking straight last night. I’m just glad it was you and not some dirt bag.” I kiss his cheek. “Hope to see you soon.”

“That would be nice. Take care of yourself and try to control yourself around that booze.”

“I think I learned my lesson.”

“How’s your head?”

“It’s been better, but I’ll live. It’s actually not hurting that bad anymore.”

“That’s good.”

He hugs me and I inhale deeply, taking in his scent. It’s odd how the smell of cigarette smoke mixed with his cologne is so comforting to me. Even more odd, I don’t want to leave him, but I know I’ve got my responsibilities to Simple Plan.

“Bye, Angel.”

“Bye, Zacky.”

I get out of his car and walk to the hotel. I turn back to the parking lot and watch as his car pulls out onto the road. I continue to walk to the hotel and am greeted by David in the lobby.

“Angelica!” he exclaims, walking over to me.

“David!” I call out, hurrying over to him and giving him a hug.

“We were worried sick about you! I think Chuck almost had a heart attack.”

My smile fades at the mention of Chuck’s name. “I just decided to see an old friend. I thought Pat told you where I was.”

“He said you went to see a friend but we didn’t think you were going to stay all night.”

“Sorry to worry you guys. I promise it won’t happen again.”

The elevator dings and my eyes dart over to it. Chuck emerges and I feel sick to my stomach; or maybe it’s just my hangover, I don’t know because I’ve never had one of these before.

“How are you holding up?” David asks, taking note of my response to Chuck.

“Okay. But I’ll admit, he’s not someone I want to see right now.”

“Hey, guys,” Chuck greets. “It’s good to see you’re okay. We were pretty worried when you didn’t check in.”

“So I’ve heard,” I reply coldly.

“I’m just going to the bus. We’ve got five minutes until we leave.”

“We’ll see you in a few,” David says.

Chuck leaves the lobby and I look up at David. “Maybe I should just go home and forget the rest of the tour.”

“No, don’t. It’ll be fine. We’ll hang out in the back room and play videogames all day.”

“Okay, that sounds like a plan, but no Chuck.”

“I promise. You don’t have to see him until you want to.”

I smile. “That sounds good to me. I’ll help you get your crap.”