Dirty Little Secret

*POV Switch*

“You guys were amazing, as usual!” I exclaim, giving David a hug. “But your jokes are getting a bit old.”

“My jokes are awesome and you know it!”

“Whatever.”

“Don’t whatever me; I’m your elder and you should respect me!”

“David, I’ll start respecting you when you start acting like my elder.”

“Aw! That means you’re never going to respect me!” He exclaims, throwing his hands up in the air in defeat.

I giggle at him as he walks away.

“So what did you think?” Chuck asks me.

“I told you guys you were amazing.”

“But me specifically, what did you think?”

“I think you did pretty good. Almost perfect I think.”

“Are you kidding? I didn’t make a single mistake! I was flawless tonight!” He puts his arm around me and we walk to the bus.

“I’m beat you guys,” I announce as I set foot on the bus.

“You’re beat? We’re the ones who just played our hearts out!” Jeff cries out.

“And it was very exhausting doing my shift at merch and watching you guys play,” I reply. “I’m going to bed, you guys.”

“Okay, we’ll make sure to be extra loud!” David shouts.

“Don’t make me kick your ass, Desrosiers!”

Everyone laughs at me. They can laugh all they want; I know that I can take David down. I may be little, but I can handle David easily.

I brush my teeth real fast and change my clothes. I go to my bunk and lie down, closing the curtain and turning on my iPod. I close my eyes, letting my music lull me to sleep.

“Hey, guess what I just found in the trash.” Seb’s voice says, jerking me out of my descent into sleep.

“Oh! I love this game! Let me take a guess! My guess is… trash!” David jokes.

“I’m serious guys, this is serious stuff.”

I open my eyes and turn my iPod down so I can hear what they’re saying.

“Serious, eh? Was it anthrax?” Pierre asks, still joking around with Seb.

“What were you doing digging through the trash anyway?” Chuck asks, sounding almost disgusted.

“I wasn’t digging around or anything, they were at the very top. You would have seen them if you just looked down into the trashcan.” Seb replies.

“What’d you find, Seb?” Jeff asks.

“Pregnancy tests.”

I swallow hard. What was I thinking just tossing them in the trash like that? I should have put them under a whole bunch of other junk.

“What!?” Pat chokes.

“Three pregnancy tests are in the trashcan. Now I would say that one of you guys was just messing around but…”

“Were they positive?” Chuck’s voice almost cracks.

“I know that one of them was. The other two were kinda covered up so I couldn’t tell and there was no way I was going to dig in the trash to see the results.”

“Who would be taking pregnancy tests?” David asks without thinking, clearly forgetting about the lone girl on the bus.

“Who do you think? There is a girl on this bus,” Pierre reminds him.

“Yeah, but she doesn’t sleep around. And even if she did, when would she have had the time to sneak a guy on here and do the deed? She is always with one of us,” David points out.

“She had the opportunity in Long Beach when she went missing…” Chuck says softly.

“But she was just visiting a friend,” Jeff reasons.

“You said it yourself earlier today, Jeff; she had the opportunity when we were in Long Beach to meet up with a guy,” Chuck retorts.

“I was just messing with her. But now that I think of it… She was looking at her calendar earlier today and seemed really nervous.”

“As in ‘Oh, shit, I might be pregnant’ nervous?” Pierre asks.

“Looking back on it, yeah. I must have scared the shit out of her when I told her she looked like France did when she found out she was pregnant.”

“Nice going, Jeff,” David scoffs. “If she is pregnant she’s gotta be scared out of her mind. And she wouldn’t have wanted us to find out like this. We should just act like we don’t know anything and wait for her to tell us. When she does tell us we will all be as supportive as we can possibly be. And ask no questions, especially about the father if she doesn’t want to tell us.”

“And if she never tells us?” Seb asks.

“She’ll tell us sooner or later. Pregnancy is kind of hard to cover up as the months go by.”

“Why are you telling us to not ask questions about the dad?” Chuck asks.

“It’s not really our business, is it?” David replies.

“And what are the chances that we’d even know the guy? I mean, I don’t even know anyone in Long Beach,” Pierre adds.

“But we do know guys in Huntington Beach,” Seb blurts.

“That’s right, we all know guys from Huntington Beach that all still live there. And they all know Angel,” Chuck says.

“You’re not talking about Avenged are you?” David asks.

“Yeah, I’m talking about Avenged. All the guys live in Huntington Beach whenever they’re not on the road and it‘s only like thirty minutes away from Long Beach.”

“And they are all taken.”

“So? Maybe one of them was weak and caved into the temptation. I could see Zack, Brian, or Johnny fooling around.”

“But would Angel sleep with any of them?”

“David’s right, Zack, Bri, and Johnny aren’t Angel’s type,” Seb chimes. “None of them are.”

“Do any of us really know what her type is? I’ve known the girl for eight years and I still don’t know her type,” Chuck replies.

“If you paid attention you’d notice,” Pierre shoots back.

“What the hell is that supposed to mean?”

“Just forget it!” Jeff exclaims. “I say we just stick with David’s plan of going about business as usual until she spills. And when she does, we don’t ask questions.”

“Fine,” Chuck sighs.

“I do have a suggestion though,” Pat pipes up, apparently over the shock.

“What is it, Pat?” David asks.

“I say that when she does tell us, one of us needs to step up to the plate and help her through the pregnancy. She needs someone to be there for her if the father isn’t.”

“That’s a good idea, Pat. And I say that her best friend should do it,” David says.

“Me?” Chuck squeaks.

“Yes, you, Comeau. You’re probably going to be the only one who can help her out the most during this whole thing. You know her better than the rest of us. You can deal with her mood swings better than anyone else.”

“You know her almost as well as I do! Plus, you’ve known her longer! You’re practically like a brother to her!”

“But she calls you her best friend out of all of us.”

“It’s true, Chuck. No matter how many arguments you guys get into at the end of the day she still calls you her best friend. I think you should be the one to step up and help her out the most. You don’t have to act like you’re the father or anything like that when it’s born, but just be there for her during the pregnancy,” Pat adds.

“Okay, I’ll do it. But we’ve gotta get her to a doctor to make sure she really is.”

“We will, but she needs to tell us first.”

I lie motionless as they continue to talk about my little secret. It’s nice that they want to be supportive and all, but forcing Chuck into taking care of me? I think it’s going too far. But Chuck would only have to do this if I don’t tell the father…

But I can’t tell Zacky... And what are the chances that he’d believe me? Or that he’d even be there for me? He’s not a jerk, but I can see him wanting nothing to do with this baby.

Maybe I should just nip this thing in the bud. Just get rid of it…

I bite my lip hard. I can’t believe I’m even considering an abortion! I could never do something like that… Could I?

I turn my music up, hoping to drown out the guys’ conversation and my thoughts. But it doesn’t help when I just so happen to be listening to Avenged Sevenfold.

I stifle a sob as I think of what a mess I’ve gotten into. If only I hadn’t gone to that bar in Huntington Beach…

I hug myself, trying to think comforting thoughts.

Oddly enough I think of Zacky. Even though he’s part of the reason I’m in this situation, my stupidity for getting drunk the other reason, I want him here to tell me that everything’s going to be okay and that he’s going to be with me every step of the way. I want to feel his strong arms around me. I want the scent of cigarettes and cologne to comfort me. I want Zacky.