Now I'm Afraid of Being On Earth [No, seriously.]
Okay, I could deal with the fact that I was suddenly afraid of gravity going away and that I was going to float into outer space. Multiple times [basically going to the library] I would be put in situations which would make my head spin with these thoughts. Usually it was on the way back home that I could get more control of them. I could sit back in the car and listen to my music and feel happy I had once again accomplished a trip outdoors and made it safely back to my room.
But about last week, ANOTHER RANDOM THOUGHT came to me. I just suddenly thought to myself of how I was on this round planet that was floating in outer space! Another thing of which I am completely petrified of!
I know, I know. We all basically learned as a kid (I think at least) about things such as gravity and space and the world and what do we do? Not give it a second thought. We just go about our lives as if nothing had changed.
But although this is yet another thing that has been around waaaaay before I was born, still, isn't scary when you just really think about it?
All of us are on something round that is currently sitting in space. Now, I just don't even know what to do. What is someone supposed to do when they can't feel safe on the one place they can't get away from - Earth!
This is yet another thought hat just came to me. I saw nothing or read nothing. It was just another one of those sudden realizations. But this one is just alot scarier than the others. I just can't help but think: planet, space, everywhere, sky, floating.
I know space is all, like, a billion miles or whatnot away from me. But. . .*shudders* just scary.
I am truly not sure what to do with myself anymore. I'm basically scared of anything and everything that I can't escape from. I'm not sure if I'll end up in therapy over summer break. I'm now much more scared to leave my house.
Please, I'll take whatever you can dish. Do I sound like some utter nut? Or does anyone else every have problems like these?
But about last week, ANOTHER RANDOM THOUGHT came to me. I just suddenly thought to myself of how I was on this round planet that was floating in outer space! Another thing of which I am completely petrified of!
I know, I know. We all basically learned as a kid (I think at least) about things such as gravity and space and the world and what do we do? Not give it a second thought. We just go about our lives as if nothing had changed.
But although this is yet another thing that has been around waaaaay before I was born, still, isn't scary when you just really think about it?
All of us are on something round that is currently sitting in space. Now, I just don't even know what to do. What is someone supposed to do when they can't feel safe on the one place they can't get away from - Earth!
This is yet another thought hat just came to me. I saw nothing or read nothing. It was just another one of those sudden realizations. But this one is just alot scarier than the others. I just can't help but think: planet, space, everywhere, sky, floating.
I know space is all, like, a billion miles or whatnot away from me. But. . .*shudders* just scary.
I am truly not sure what to do with myself anymore. I'm basically scared of anything and everything that I can't escape from. I'm not sure if I'll end up in therapy over summer break. I'm now much more scared to leave my house.
Please, I'll take whatever you can dish. Do I sound like some utter nut? Or does anyone else every have problems like these?
Posted on June 6th, 2009 at 08:17am
I belive you are scared of dieing. But I know what you mean space...earth its sooo unreal they give us explaintions of why we are here but really DOSE it make since? Thats what it all comes down to floating. How did we possibley end up here ther must be other thing people even out ther if not its just a waste of space litterly sooooo many many thjings we have no idea about at what happens at the end of space is there just a walll that stops??? Whatys beyond that walkll like black holes you would get crushed if you were ever in one... but what might it lead to. These question are sooo big sooo unknown it bugss and scares me along with fasanates me.
Rainbow_Blood, September 1st, 2009 at 11:10:52am
If I stare at the sky for too long I feel like I'm going to fall off the Earth. It's terrifying.
Skiffle., June 6th, 2009 at 04:38:55pm
hmmm...Space can be overwhelming but it really can be stopped.
Homicidal Maniac, June 6th, 2009 at 03:02:36pm
I wish someone could call me pretty. I know what you mean by that. Mom and relatives just dont cut it. I sadly dont know how to change that, I wish I could though.
You're never alone, although sometimes you might think it. We all think like that sometimes. But Im telling you, 99% of the people you walk by feel the same way. I wish people didnt die of violence and hate and things like that. The only way a person should really die is of natural causes. And in comfort.
Im glad I could help you. If you feel the need to talk it out more or to just rant, I would 100% listen and give you advice. I would never tell you anything rude like that. People feelings are complexed, and although on the outside may look selfish and shallow, when you get deeper into other problems, you find out its more then what the outside tells you. But I knew when I first read this, that this was nothing small
Prof.Snuffleupagus, June 6th, 2009 at 11:30:45am
Thank you Moonlight_Helena
Maybe letting everything out online felt a bit helpful to fully understand my situation, and I'm glad you didn't go all, "You're so stupid that you're acting this way just because you don't have a boyfriend." I know to alot of people a boyfriend may not be everything, but to some people it is. I mean, I think I want one more for the typical of basically being told I'm pretty and stuff, because, let's face it, it isn't too helpful hearing it from just a mom or something. And to also fill this pitiful empty void I have in my life that my "friends" can't provide.
But, yeah, I think I do know gravity isn't going anywhere and if it would, scientists would do something to help us. I think I just have to tell myself I'm not alone in alot of my situations. Lots of people think about things that I do, I'm sure - I just haven't found them yet. xD
I also agree with how it would suck if we could live forever, I never thought of the population thing and such, though. I just knew we wouldn't be dying. I guess thinking of it in that way it isn't as scary, but yes it's still freakin' scary.
I think for now, the gravity thing is fading on me and being replaced with the "planet" thing. But I think the planet thing is scarier. <.< So I need to somehow find a way to control it or face it or whatnot. <.<
YaoiRox666, June 6th, 2009 at 11:20:17am
I understand. I felt the same way. I still do. Death is a terrifying thought. When someone you knew personally dies, it hits you that it could happen to anyone. And it will happen. You see it on TV but to fully understand the power of death, you have to have death close to you.
As for feeling left out and not having a boyfriend because of how you look, I can kinda relate. But then again, Im only thirteen. Im sure one day I will be able, but I know how it feels to be left out because of your weight or you think others are prettier and that you have to be skinny. It happens to me. But what I do about that is just lok in the mirror and tell myself I am pretty and one day I will find a great guy. I wouldnt think much about boyfriends and stuff like that because usually, it doesnt work well.
If everyone lived forever, it would be horrible. Think, over population, starvation, poverty because of to many humans. It might seem great, but in the long run, it's a disaster.
The gravity wont leave. And if it does, there will be signs. And scientist are smart enough to figure out something to save us. Also, when you start feeling upset or begin to feel out of place or lonely, think of something else. If you are feeling bad, just start to sing a tune or do something random. If you are feeling like an outcast, think about the ones who do stand by you. Im not saying the fear will disappear right away, but Im sure it will pass. Sometimes, worries and sadness and confusion are brought on by yourself
Prof.Snuffleupagus, June 6th, 2009 at 10:55:25am
Well, basically, I think there is some huge story of my [over dramatic one might call it] past. But even when I was a kid [and when I got older] I just questioned alot of things without letting them go. Like death. I mean, I know alot of people have experienced deaths younger than me, but in fourth grade my dad died because of alcohol poisoning. And apparently after that my mom said I changed. Like I guess I was doing worse in school and stuff. So she sent to a shrink - which I fought her tooth and nail not to send me to, because I didn't understand fully of why I had to go. I didn't feel crazy or anything. And I was never really close to my dad. I didn't care much for how he acted when he was drunk or not drunk. I mean, yeah he had times of being a good dad, but for the most part, I guess I felt emotionless towards him.
So in middle school, I got into the whole "goth" phase. But I was happy but upset. Upset because I was really overweight and happy because I was talkative and didn't care what anyone thought.
So then when I got to high school, I was still sort of into the whole "goth" thing. To which eventually I sort of drifted from because I didn't find it worth it [the makeup and all] and just wore baggy clothes because I was growing really self-conscious by comparing myself to not only my "friends" but to all the other girls. Eventually, near 10th grade I believe, I started to get strongly envious of basically all girls. They were so much better looking than an almost 300 pound creature who was allegedly female, like me. I couldn't help but want what they had and knew I couldn't get - a boyfriend.
So I grew to be rather icy towards anyone I knew had one. And soon by 11th grade, EVERYONE I was "friends" with had a boyfriend. No guy in my life showed any single interest in me. And I hated girls for being prettier/skinnier, etc. I felt so alone. Especially with how on weekends I just knew not to ask anyone to do anything because they might be busy with their "boyfriends". Also, sometime in 11th grade [near the beginning] It was like a sudden realization of how I was going to die. And how we all die. It was on my mind for so long. I looked at people and wondered how they could be happy knowing their future involved death in the end. And I just started to question: why do we die? Why can't we live forever?
Eventually I just sort of grew used to it. But one night I was just going for a walk and something struck me. Like another sudden realization of how I was out in the open and everything. Around that time, I didn't leave the house whatsoever and I panicked if I had to. It was a few days later when I actually had the thought of "could gravity go away?"
I just freaked and basically floating into space came into mind. But nothing of believing I was on Earth, etc.
But, yeah. I sort of think that my thoughts have to do with my self-consciousness, loneliness and death and dying fear.
Wow, that felt pretty good to tell, actually. xD
YaoiRox666, June 6th, 2009 at 10:32:33am
I dont want that to happen. I may not know you well, but I still feel scared for you.
Maybe, when you were upset, you started feeling something or you didn't understand something or you didn't like what happened that you started blaming gravity. It depends on what you were upset about. You could of blamed it on gravity, causing you to be afraid of that feeling or thought. Because, it always made you upset. But perhaps you were already upset before thinking of it.
Im not sure, like I said I dont know you well enough to fully understand. But if you ever need to talk or just get out your fears, you can tell me. Like you said, you dont want to become sick. And although its becoming a mental illness (Not a mental disease or something, more of a thought and emotions you know?) it may decend into a illness that effects your body altogether
Prof.Snuffleupagus, June 6th, 2009 at 10:12:10am
Ah, I see your point.
And I agree. This stuff should be left up to scientists/people who are truly interested in this stuff. I was never interested in anything scientific. I was just another person who lived life without one of these thoughts - and a very outdoorsy person, I might add. I loved being outside in open and free areas, unlike now. So this double sucks. :[[
I have someone in my house who says I can talk to her or ask her to walk with me. I mean, I probably can't official walk outside like I used to, but maybe I could sit outside and talk to her or at least walk around the house. And I mean, I have to really look up to my mom [random as this may sound] with how she's gone through so much in the past something years and yet she never gave a single thought like I had. Like if I was upset over something, all I could think about was, "gravity going away". I mean, I talked to her last night because it was bothering me so much and I didn't know where else to go. And she gave me some responses I liked. I know I have to start getting out before I probably start getting super super sick. <.<
YaoiRox666, June 6th, 2009 at 10:00:15am
I even feel a bit frighten when thinking about it. How this earth is just a rock in space. But I leave that stuff to the scientist. I mean, why worry about it now? We're still here.
Gravity has been here since the earth was made, why would it suddenly leave? But I understand your point of view. Phobias aren't the funnest thing.
Im sure it will pass eventually. I hope it will. Until it does, take baby steps. Im not saying run out side and stay outside, but maybe just walking down your driveway and, if it is as bad as you tell me, tie a rope to something hard that will surely stick to the ground. (And Im not making fun of you in that last statement. Im just not sure how bad the phobia is)
Prof.Snuffleupagus, June 6th, 2009 at 09:52:51am
Thank you. :]
Actually, I think you're right about the fear thing. I saw a shrink because of the school twice and she asked me why I thought space was scary, to which I answered, "Well, it never ends." And she just asked, "But how is that scary?" I didn't know how to answer that. I thought my answer was obvious enough. <.<
YaoiRox666, June 6th, 2009 at 09:47:09am
You cant let this fear take over your life. You have to face it sometime. But I know, it is easier said then done.
I remember I had a fear of bees, I would not go outside at all. But after a while I started to think of all the things Im missing. I stood up, opened the door....... then slammed it shut and ran back in.
It will take a while until you breathe easily. Im not sure when, I fully dont understand fear myself.
I think everyone is scared of things they dont understand
Prof.Snuffleupagus, June 6th, 2009 at 09:42:37am
ALLthefreakinway.
Of course, thanks for the comment. And I'm sorry for making you start to think about problems. :[
YaoiRox666, June 6th, 2009 at 09:29:57am
I'm more past fear. Basically I completely shelter myself inside my house now. I haven't been away from it in a few weeks. <.<
I'm petrified of thinking I'll either go into a seizure with these thoughts, or I'll truly hallucinate and think I'm floating. D:
YaoiRox666, June 6th, 2009 at 09:24:58am
I don't have problems like these, but you make total sense and now I'm beginning to think I have problems.
But you can't let the fear of...space/floating take over you. You'll scare yourself.
chace crawford., June 6th, 2009 at 09:15:44am