How about dying for a change?
So I went back to the doctors today to get more blood tests done. I guess my chemo isn't working, and I don't know if I wanna keep on trying. If I do keep on doing it, then I'll most likely spend the rest of my life sick and in pain, and if I don't continue doing it, I'll die, but I won't be in as much pain. I don't really know what to do. I don't wanna keep living like this. I'm 14 years old, and I'm dying from leukimia. People are always asking me how I feel. They want to here that I'm doing good, but how can I lie to them. Am I just supossed to say "Pretty shitty, thanks"? That's not what anyone want's to here.
So here I am, trying to decide if I basically want to keep living or not. Is that seriously what my life has come to?
Guess so.
So, how's everyone doing?
So here I am, trying to decide if I basically want to keep living or not. Is that seriously what my life has come to?
Guess so.
So, how's everyone doing?
Posted on May 31st, 2008 at 07:32pm
Oh, I'm so sorry! It's got to be very hard to live with cancer! But, I guess there's two sides to and you have to choose a side. Either you can stop fighting this terrible disease and give in or you can be as strong as you possibly can and fight this. Continue the chemo and look for more treatment options. Ask your doctor, research more options online but still try the chemo, fight while you're on the chemo.
As hard as it is, when you think about dying, you're pretty much giving up. And sure, there are many deaths related to cancer or caused by cancer. But, you need to fight this disease, for your family, friends and most importantly for yourself. Remain as strong as you can! I'm here to talk if you need to!
DaschundPup2007, June 24th, 2008 at 04:13:05pm
I wish you a lot of luck and hope you recover, even though I don't know who you are. I feel sorry for you. :( .
xXxLaNd.hErMiExXx, May 31st, 2008 at 11:05:34pm
My friend Anna died of Acute Myeloid Leukemia in January. There was nothing more they could do for her, so they sent her home to have pallative care.
But she never gave up, not for one second, even after all the options had run out. And you can't either. Because you might be in pain now, but you have to fight.
Think about it, if you fight, there's a chance you might survive. If you just give up, you won't.
When Anna died, it changed everything. Whenever I see her parents, or her sisters, it breaks my heart, because their lives are so different now. Their family chain is broken without Anna. Her mum openly admitted to mine that life is sh*t now, and that she hates it, because she lost her daughter.
Could you do that to your family without fighting first? Could you leave all that heartbreak behind? I know it's harsh to say when you're going through all that pain, but reality is harsh, as I'm sure you know.
When my friend Anna died, they used her blood to start a cell line, for research, to hopefully find a cure for people like you. Who knows, maybe the cure will be found within the next few months, or years, thanks to things like that. Could you give up knowing that months after you die, a cure might be found?
I know I couldn't.
annie; forever., May 31st, 2008 at 08:38:58pm
two of my friends died last year of Lukimia. i say keep trying, i dont wnat to have known of someone else to have died of the same thing. Just watching Charlotte and Joe die was hard enough. T_T
i think you should keep trying, you could get better! but at the end of the day, its up to you. do what you thinks best for yourself and the people around you.
Crystal-Meth, May 31st, 2008 at 08:15:05pm
I don't know what to say. I've never met anyone with cancer before. (Well, actually, that's not true. My granfather had cancer, but he died when I was two, so I figure that doesn't count since I didn't REALLY know him.) You have to make a choice that's harder than what most people have to deal with, especially at your age. Do you still want to live? Do you have a need to live? Like for someone else, or something you need to do before you go? Until you decide that there's no reason for you to live anymore, I'd keep going. But then again, I'm not you.
Sachiel, May 31st, 2008 at 07:40:09pm