Poem 2

They never could quite find my heart
Though I thank them for the try
I lie on this table,
And through blood-shot eyes you ask me "Why?"

But I have a question also, my sweet
And a question just for you
All I can remember are shackles,
And now they're sticking a needle in my arm, too

Where did I finally go wrong, my love?
Where did I finally fall?
Where did I finally lose control?
And where did I finally lose it all?

Now close your eyes and turn away
For even I can't bare to look
Paying the price I must
For all the many lives I took

Those faces beyond the glass
Stare at me with utter scorn
Is this what I was bound to be...
Ever since my day born?

Liquid hitting liquid
Chemical versus blood
They should have given the world solace
And long before given me this drug

So where did I finally go wrong, my love?
Where did I finally fall?
Where did I finally lose control?
And where did I finally lose it all?

You know they lie about death
Bright lights and flashing memories
I would clarify for you
But I don't want to kill the stories

And on my gravestone don't lie
All I want is my name and a phrase, just one
A phrase I've always lived by:
"Because it was fucking fun"