dear dad

Dear, Dad
I really hate you. i will always love you,but i hate you.I wish that you would stop drinking,ans wasting ur life away.I think thart you really need to understand what u are doing to me.U told me 4 days ago that after those 4 beers you would quit forever. nd it was just another lie that u told me.nd i keep believing u that u will stop,but u dnt.And i as i walk down stairs i find you drinking away,nd that broke my heart,nd that day was the day i stopped believing what you say.you are just a LIE like everything in my life/all i am asking is for you to realize what ur are doing to me,nd how much u are hurting me. but i know that that is not going to happen. no matter how many times ppl tell u to stop and no matter how many times my threapist tell u to stop becuz i am cutting,u just drink more and more every time u hear ppl tell u that.i want you to be a real parent and not a drunkin dad.that isnt even my father in my world.every freind that i meet and they find out that u are a drunk they arent my freinds anymore. u are ruining my life.the only thing that u are teching me is to not be like u wen i grow up,becuz i dnt want my kids to go through the pain and what i am going through,becuz nobody deserves to go through what i am going through.all you do is drink all day.I CANT HANDLE IT ANYMORE!!! U need hepl really bad.i hope wen u read this it will change ur mind.nd hopefully ur not readinf this becuz i have killed myself.i really hope that i dnt get to that point,but i am already at the point that i am cutting.