Au Natural

At work today, one of my many jobs, I was working at the coffee franchise I work at. I really love it there, it's not like the club or the gym, but the people are fabulous and I fit in pretty well, at least, they make me feel that way. It could all be BS.

Anyway, this one guy comes in all the time and i've taken to calling him "Chai" because I don't know his actual name. He's a customer, I'm a barista. Anyway, I flirt, and he doesn't flirt back, or maybe, he does, whatever he's doing, we've had a few pleasent conversations.

Anyway, he came in today and i've been pretty sick lately, so I was running late and didn't have much energy for doing my make-up or put on the "nicer" version of my uniform. One of the girls at work was trying to help me out with getting his name, but I was too shy to talk to him, which brought me to this conclusion:

With or without a layer of foundation on, I would present the same conversation pieces, opinons, aspirations, and truths. I love experimenting with make-up, but I know well enough that it doesn't showcase or describe me, so why did I let that hold me back from chatting with "Chai" today, huh?

We blame the media for our issues with self-esteem a lot, and in some aspects, it is to blame, but if I'm smart enough to know that I am not the make-up I wear, why aren't I smart enough to know that media outlets make money off my insecurities?

There is a deeper problem than biased advertising and media in our society, and whatever the cause is, we are the effects, so therefore, we are the solution.

Tommorrow my goal is: like myself. I've been trying to change for so long, I'm not sure what i've been trying to change now. I could be pretty awesome as is.