behind a smile

I hate my life, so i lay and wonder why this happens to me. i cut, cut so deep. blood rolls, rolls to the floor. the scarz there to remind me of the harm i have done. it feels so right but yet so wrong. i'm hiding behind a smile. on the outside i seem "normal" but on the inside is where the pain lies.

i lay and cry myself to sleep at night. trying to figure things out

should i stay or should i go?

i ask myself. its hard to go on each day. i kow i am doin wrong, but it is the only way to get through the day