Only Me

Everyone makes mistakes except I feel mine are worse, and it doesn’t matter how many times I say I'm sorry it’s as if the words don’t mean enough when I say them.

Like I’m trying to say so much more than I’m sorry. You have no idea how shitty I feel. Its right when my life starts to get better there I go messing it up again.

Truly I’m a monster inside my own body, destroying my future and my past trying to live in the present. I guess I’m just jealous of you, you are so perfect that whenever I’m around you my imperfection shows only that much greater than before.

I can loose all the sleep I want the nightmares I have are only better that the one I’m living. And no matter how many times I say it, the words that always seem to form my mouth you have every right to be mad.

I’m sorry I’m India Ares Callahan, that’s all I can be no matter how hard I try not to I still am myself in all my mistakes make me who I am today, tomorrow, and who I was yesterday.

But please know that I’m sorry isn’t half of what I want to say. So take care of you and ill take care of me. Were just lonely hearts looking for love, I’m looking for a safe way out, I’m not in a habit to open my eyes to the truth and if you’re leaving I’m already gone.

Maybe giving up's not bad just part of letting go. Empty fields move me so much more than rooms filled up with friend’s maybe that’s just the kind of guy I am I was always alone and now choose to be alone. It might not be a good thing but it numbs the pain and keeps me out of trouble for now