Dear Corey;

i dont even know where to start. Well, i guess i should start with i miss you. i miss everything about you and i wish you were still here. I bawled putting up the christmas tree yesterday because you, Taylor and Mat were always there to put it up with me, and you're not here...any of you...any more.
i just got use to not having Taylor here with me, and it's still raw with you. i still cry over Taylor, but i'm still devestated over you. I think because it was your choice, and you did it. being the one to find you didn't help me either. i will never, ever. forget that day. i still wake in a cold sweat over it. i still wake up crying. i still can't catch my breath when i think about it. i'm still lost over you.
i miss waking up next to you, i miss your voice. i miss the way your different gray eyes use to shine when you were up to no good. i miss watching you play your guitar and i miss the way you could sing and it seemed like the world would drift away. I miss your skin, and i miss your tattoos. Or the way you would bite your lip when you were scared. I miss driving around aimlessly with you, and i miss the way you would scowl at me when i would kick my feet up on the dash of your candy apple red charger. I miss just hanging out with you, drinking coffee and smoking cigarettes at your kitchen table.
What about all of the things we had planned, baby? what about the things you promised me? What about the kids we will never get to have now? What about me...i dont even know how to function without you. but i'm trying. i'm trying for you. because that's what you would want. and i'm going to be successful in my life, because that's what you would want. Whatever happened to Heaven Can Wait?.....

I guess I'm living for you now, because you can't anymore. Don't worry, i won't let your memory die. it's always going to be with me. you'll always be in my heart. I could go on forever, but i wont. i wish you were still here, but i know you're here. Heaven doesnt have to wait anymore, i guess i'll be the one that has to wait.

i love you.