I see... I see... I wish I were blind.

I see your name everywhere I go. I see your face wherever I look. Everything I see, touch, smell, taste, hear, it makes me think of you. You broke my heart. Placed it on a table and smashed it to millions of tiny dust particles. No matter how many people I meet, no matter how many people I have feelings for, the feelings I have for you are always coming up. I compare relationships to you. I compare lovers to you. I compare myself to you and everything is dull in comparison, the dullest of greys, muddiest of browns, the most lusterless piece of gold in the universe. My world is spiraling out of orbit without you, center of my universe. I break down in tears at night and wonder what if. What if I hadn't been so clingy? What if I hadn't been so paranoid? What if we had never met? What if you still love me? What if you want me back as much as I want you back? What if you read this and think I'm a pathetic loser? What if I were to die and you felt nothing? These questions and many more squeeze into my concious and drive me insane. I can't think straight most times and I don't feel most emotions. Right now my heart physically aches as I recount all the past feelings and emotions. I wish I knew where you were so I could rip it out and present it to you as a Christmas gift. It would be just as well, since we both know you already hold my heart in the palm of your hand. I'll always be yours and I'll always be here whenever you want me. I know, I'm pathetic, but I can't see myself with anyone else and noone else measures up to you. They are all glow worms next to your brilliant radiance.