Invisible To Whom I Iove

Today was just another day,thinking of Tokio Hotel,well Tom Kaulitz. Well I'm obsessed with him,I guess I evolve around him. I love everything I know about him,but he doesnt know about me. I don't even exist to him,I'm nothing. I cut sometimes just because I know I'm not loved. I sit alone and listen to Bill sing ,but mostly listening to the guitar,he plays. If I could I would jump at any chance of meeting him,but I wouldn't at the same time. I'm afraid that he might reject me,but who cares I know you don't but I do.Sometimes I wish my life would end but something keeps holding me back,is it him or just my worthlessness? I sit alone,I'm a loser in society,I'm a freak,but I like it being this way. If people really knew what I am thinking I would be push out into a bigger outcast. I know he doesnt know me but I feel like I'm being cheated on. All I'm doing is letting my life slip away from me,I've been gaining weight like crazy,but I know what I'm going to do to drop it. You probably know what it is... well I love him and I just can't get him out of my head,I dream about him.I think I'm going crazy and the only thing thats keeping me sane is him. He has kids,but so,I don't care,but he should have him in his life. I think thats what he does need to do. People call me fat ugly bitch whore hoe slut cunt and so many others,it hurts me but not as deep as if he said it to me. Other girls say they love him like I do,but I know they are much better than I'll ever be. I love him but they are going to have you... I love you Tom Kaulitz and I'm invisible to you.

Ich Liebe Dich