Please don't think I'm writing this journal to get attention. I just need to talk to someone.
A few weeks ago, I had to go to the hospital because I cut myself too deep. I've already posted a journal about the hospital and everything, but I really need to tell someone why I did it. Everyone keeps asking, and I want more than anything to tell them, but they'd know how completely f*cked up I am if I told them. And most everyone on Mibba is f*cked up, right? So I figured some people here might understand.
There's this guy... And he's absolutely amazing. He's sweet, and funny, and he likes good music, and he's smart, and he's completely f*cking adorable. And I thought he liked me for a while... But,see, the I started thinking about it.
He really only started talking to me when he found out I cut myself. And I'm really not that interesting, and I'm really not that pretty.
So, in gym, after everyone left the locker room, I looked at myself in the mirror. I was just thinking, How the hell could he like this.
So I went into the bathroom, and I cut myself. Seven stitches over a boy who doesn't even like me back. How f*cking ridiculous is that?
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March 22nd, 2011 at 04:11am