dreams.

i used to have the most amazing dreams. they were so vivid, so beautiful. when i slept, my mind had room to roam, room to flow, room to think without me stopping it. i can;t remember the last time i dreamed. when i sleep, so does my mind. i wake up remembering only blackness. is that what sadness looks like? black? am i normal for not dreaming?

i miss dreaming. i miss a lot of things. is my mind too far gone? has the depression consumed me so much that i can't dream? im afraid that all ill be is depressed.

the worst part is that i can't think of myself without it. its a part of me, and i can't change that. which scares me. a lot.

i miss dreams.

i even miss nightmares.

i just want a little bit of subconscious activity.

it feels like im lost. in my own mind.

i feel dead.