"I'm just tired." Biggest lie ever.

Today was just one of those days where I just got annoyed easily and depressed more than often. I thought about how stupid I am for throwing myself at Sean and giving him a link to an entry I wrote. (which basically said all the stuff I would do to be the best girlfriend ever.) And I don't even know if he read it..and I've just been nervous about it all.

And today in study hall I was beating myself up for doing such a silly thing to Sean and it really got me thinking..which is always bad,cause then I create problems that originally weren't there before.Kinda like I made myself to believe half the stuff I think up.. if that makes any sense.

But anyways I came to conclusion that girls like me are the reason why guys are single & think little of women. I'm stupid,annoying,obnoxious, emotional,sensitive,and clingy. Guys don't wanna talk about serious stuff half the time. Like my friend John said to me before "they act like they care but they don't. because they have their own problems to worry about.:"

But I have so much to offer to give up now,ya know? I know I'm not hot like Megan Fox,but I have a heart of gold. No guy now a days wants that. Cause no one falls in love with personality at first sight. It's all about looks. So..I'm sh*t out of luck.

I don't get why I put myself down a lot..let alone understanding why I put myself in these situations.