Help me PLZ!

Hello i really need help i have been thinking of killing myself recently. I have already tried twice. Third times the charm right?

Why do i want to kill myself? Im bullied constantly i can't do this anymore. Im a fake nothing. I can act like im happy but im dead inside. Im called a bitch that im immature and that I need to grow up. Im a bigger girl and they use that to make fun of me too Fatty, Ogre, and others.

Im finding suicide is the only way out of this. I dont know what else to do. I have gone to a counsler to my mom to my friends nothings working so now im reaching out to complete strangers.
Im sick of everyone being in relationships and being happy and im the third wheel ALWAYS. I have tried. I have told a guy how i feel about him and he laughed and from then on i havent been able to talk to another guy like i use to be able to. I just feel so alone and i really wish someone would hold me....

Please im just asking for a bit of help here and im sorry if im wasting your time </3

~a7xloverfoREVer out~