fall in the grave i've been digging myself.

dare me to jump off of this jersey bridge
i bet you never had a friday night like this
keep it up, keep it up, let's raise our hands

hello. it's been a while. but...i'm still alive.

i'm still deciding if that's a good thing or a bad thing.

i take a look up at the sky and i see
red for the cancer, red for the wealthy,
red for the drink that's mixed with suicide
everything red

i'm a lot different. this summer has changed me. i was betrayed a lot in the past few months. the only good thing in my life fucked me over. my walls are higher. like that's a surprise.

please, won't you push me for the last time?
let's scream until there's nothing left
so sick of playing, i don't want this anymore
the thought of you's no fucking fun
you want a martyr? i'll be one
because enough's enough, we're done

depression is a cloud that constantly follows me. it...sucks. there was a period there when i actually had nobody. and then i met him.

pass me another bottle, honey
the jager's so sweet but if it keeps you around
then i'm down

and he's my best friend. he seriously understands me better than anybody i have ever met. he's got the most amazing eyes...and when he hugs me, everything is better.

suddenly, things don't suck quite as bad.