Family

Is it not funny how you think that your family could not possibably do anything else that would cause you anymore pain then what you already have gone through? Well I am here to say that I thought I had been put through enough family pain to last me a life time, but little did I know that the sexual abuse and the verbal, physical and mental abuse was just the tip of the iceberg. For look at me now I will be starting college in the fall and there is any problem that I now face.
I am not even going to say that I even know where to start to help my family grow back togeether after what had happened. I thought that I would never have to deal with nightmares or the worest pain that I have felt so far again. I was wrong for the past two weeks I have had a very bad feeling. The other night I had my first nightmare in the past year. Now at first I though it was nothing and that I could brush it aside. No sooner had I brushed it aside when all hell broke loss.
I know have seen the police twice and one day. I think that I must be lossing my mind because I am literally getting pushed to my breaking point and I honest don't think that I can put up with this anymore. For so much has happen to my family that I honest thought we could move on, but that would be a little to easy. For a family memeber was taken by police to the station and I honest don't think that she is going to get out of this one as easily as she did the last time.
I am to the point of wanting to move out of my house with my other sis because it has become way to unsafe thanks to my other family member. The only down fall to that is I have no money and no place to go. So I guess I kwill have to stay here where I am for now.
I just pray to God that this family member either gets taken away to a place were she will be help more then my mom or I can give her as of this moment in time. I know that may not ever happen, but I can honest hope that happens. For I think maybe then I will be able to rest a little bit easier at night. Then my mom won't have to worry durning the night "will she get up in the middle of the night and run."
I just want my life to go back to the way it was in order for me to be able to know what it feels like to be safe and not have to worry about anything anymore. Yet I know that is only a shot in the dark. Nevertheless I can't put up with much more of this because if I get pushed to my breaking point then I might not be able to return.