Update on my life.

{read my other life ones before you read this.}

September 1st
So last time i checked in I had two new best friends and some sucky teachers. The summer following that was HELL.

So here's what happened:

I started to cut. My dad was always drunk and he wousld say hurtful things. They sting so dedep inside. He would tell his friends that if they had kids that they could do way better than me. He also said if I died he would just send flowers. I started to drink. I felt like if i just drank enough to almost float by everything..it would be okay.

Things got complicated with my crush. I found out I won't be going to the same school as him anymore because he's going to a private school. He would write songs and share them only with me. He would even use me as inspiration. THe would so often be love poems. Most times he wouldnt be in the mood to talk..but once in a while he would want to talk and when I had to leave he would say aww. I would ask what? you want to talk to me? and he would say YEAH! I would tell him i felt special and he would say I should. I guess he meant this in a close friend sort of way though.

I told him a few months later that I loved him. He didn't reply. My friend asked he why he wasn't responding. I had told him that he should just tell me he hates me if he isn't going to reply. He told my friend that he definately does not hate me, but he doesnt love me either. Things were a little awkward but whatev.

Now, one oth those best friends baisically stopped talking to me. The other one became very close to me. She knew how important that guys was to me. One day she decided that we should all hang out, but then she said she was going to make-out with him while i was there. I told dher no and she went psycho on my ass. She even called me the C word.

My only best friend I had left was My crush who was usually a dumbass and then War_Warn_Lipstick or Frankii or Katrina. I met her here on Mibba. She's the closest person I truely have.