I am Alliance.

Ive never been sure of who I am.. and now all of that is changing. I know who I am. I am the girl who everyone doesn't like...which I don't understand but maybe its because im eccentric. Which came first; depression or the loss of self? I used to be a little happy person.. just like all of you used to. I used to have feelings but now I think its common and necessary to be hated upon because im very melancholy and morose. I sit by myself and wonder if maybe one day I will have another friend.. I wonder if my 'new' friend will end up the same way Jon did.. I push people away because I am afraid it will happen again..
maybe im too hard on myself?
Doesn't seem liable to me though..