Cheated

Her fingers drum on the desk, a beat I can’t recall
Her pencil is full of bite marks, her eraser as well
Her teeth bite her ragged nails, the short stubs become shorter

She takes the paper and looks at me
She smiles at me, winks at me, and looks to her paper
Her face is edged with confusion as she looks back towards me

She holds up one finger but I don’t reply
She starts to whisper but I pretend not to hear
Does she feel confused, angry, betrayed?

Why should I put myself at risk?
I know what to do, for it is easy
For some the choice is hard, but a decision is needed

I hear the click of heels coming closer
I bend down closer towards my paper, my hair shields my face
My pen flies as if it has wings across the paper

Is it not I who should be confused, angry, betrayed?
She wanted to use me, but I refused
To her I was a tool and someone to use; for I was not a friend

I hear the swish of paper being taken and I know it’s her’s
Had I not refused, it would have been mine
Her face is flushed with anger and embarrassment as she looks to me

Her face is flushed, but I don’t feel pity
She sends me a silent plea that I know is not real
I realize now that nothing about her is real

I just want to ask her, just to hear what she says,
Do you know who I am? Do you remember my name?
Even though I want to, don’t speak, I know she’s not worth my breath or my words

I shake my head and don’t smile because she wanted to cheat
She got caught, but it was not because of me
Is it wrong to feel it is right, that justice has been served?

Yet still I have a sinking feeling I ignore it as I continue and turn a page
For I realize she was never my friend;
So how do I feel? How should I feel? For I have mixed emotions.

For I have been cheated, cheated of a friend,
Scammed, conned by an enemy,
And lied to by someone no longer important