The Price to Pay

Too numb to feel,
Too hurt to heal,
Too scared to run,
Too sad for fun.
Too wired to sleep,
I'm in too deep,
Surrounded by pain,
I'm drowning in rain.
When will it end?
How will I mend?
I can't break this hold;
My heart's turning cold.
Too young to die,
I'm living a lie,
It's the price to pay for being a spy.