Chelsea Smile
There once was a girl called Chelsea Smile
A name her countenance contradicts
For our dear friend, miss Chelsea Smile
Had a face on which a frown was fixed
Day and night, week by week
She’d sit and frown and never speak
Dear Chelsea, when she was asked why
Gave only this simple reply:
“Our dear world has forsaken me;
A life I’ve once held dear
No longer seems to be sweet or nice
For what is life but tears?”
So Chelsea resolved to sit and frown
And sit and frown she would
Our dear little Chelsea Smile
Was sure to frown for good
Until one day the news came on
Four bodies in the creek
Nearly made our Chelsea smirk
But only made her speak
“Ha, what fools who die so young
Who rot and burn in hell
If only I could meet the killer
I’m sure I’d be alive and well”
Be sure, dear child, that at that time
She thought she was alone
But secretly there was a man
In the window of her home
He bounded through the open glass
As silent as a mouse
And this madman was now set loose
In Chelsea Smile’s house
Our dear friend Chelsea Smile
Was sure to meet her doom
For now this evil killer
Was in that very room
“Oh, you poor thing,” he drawled
And she spun around to stare
“I’ve heard of you; you never smile
But I’ll fix that, my dear.”
This madman was a sinner
Of the deadliest degree
And if you were there that night
I’m sure you would agree
The lightning shone, the thunder crashed
And it made Chelsea jump
You could hear the pounding of her heart
Ba-bump. Ba-bump. Ba-bump.
“If only you’ll smile, you’ll save yourself,”
The killer said with glee
“An impossible task for every victim
Is set and judged by me.”
Chelsea tried her hardest
But her pretty face was stuck
And now poor Chelsea smile
Was really truly out of luck
“No? Too bad,” the madman said
As casual as can be
“I promise I’ll let you go.
You have to the count of three.”
She tried and tried to fix her frown
But it was all for naught;
And you’ll find soon enough
Exactly what she got.
“One… two… three!” the madman counted
Twisted smile and evil leer
No matter what his expression was
His intentions were clear
He took a knife from the butcher block
As he had passed the dining room
And Chelsea Smile truly feared
Her imminent doom
She remembered the images on the news
And gave a frightened wail
When she looked back she realized
She was equally as frail
To frightened to run, too scared to think
Dear Chelsea couldn’t move
All she knew was I’m going to die
She knew it to be true
And then he brought down the knife
On miss Chelsea Smile’s face
And as he did, the killer laughed
And afterwards left the place
When investigators arrived on the scene
They knew just what went on
And they also knew that Chelsea Smile
Was too far dead and gone
As they looked at the body
The paramedics retched
It was even worse than they had seen
In the police team’s sketch
Poor Chelsea Smile’s perpetual frown
Was forcibly upturned
Her body was covered in bruises and marks
That made everyone’s stomach churn
Ripped in her face was one simple line
Stretching ear to ear
It was the smile she never gave
That was promised to save poor Chelsea dear
A name her countenance contradicts
For our dear friend, miss Chelsea Smile
Had a face on which a frown was fixed
Day and night, week by week
She’d sit and frown and never speak
Dear Chelsea, when she was asked why
Gave only this simple reply:
“Our dear world has forsaken me;
A life I’ve once held dear
No longer seems to be sweet or nice
For what is life but tears?”
So Chelsea resolved to sit and frown
And sit and frown she would
Our dear little Chelsea Smile
Was sure to frown for good
Until one day the news came on
Four bodies in the creek
Nearly made our Chelsea smirk
But only made her speak
“Ha, what fools who die so young
Who rot and burn in hell
If only I could meet the killer
I’m sure I’d be alive and well”
Be sure, dear child, that at that time
She thought she was alone
But secretly there was a man
In the window of her home
He bounded through the open glass
As silent as a mouse
And this madman was now set loose
In Chelsea Smile’s house
Our dear friend Chelsea Smile
Was sure to meet her doom
For now this evil killer
Was in that very room
“Oh, you poor thing,” he drawled
And she spun around to stare
“I’ve heard of you; you never smile
But I’ll fix that, my dear.”
This madman was a sinner
Of the deadliest degree
And if you were there that night
I’m sure you would agree
The lightning shone, the thunder crashed
And it made Chelsea jump
You could hear the pounding of her heart
Ba-bump. Ba-bump. Ba-bump.
“If only you’ll smile, you’ll save yourself,”
The killer said with glee
“An impossible task for every victim
Is set and judged by me.”
Chelsea tried her hardest
But her pretty face was stuck
And now poor Chelsea smile
Was really truly out of luck
“No? Too bad,” the madman said
As casual as can be
“I promise I’ll let you go.
You have to the count of three.”
She tried and tried to fix her frown
But it was all for naught;
And you’ll find soon enough
Exactly what she got.
“One… two… three!” the madman counted
Twisted smile and evil leer
No matter what his expression was
His intentions were clear
He took a knife from the butcher block
As he had passed the dining room
And Chelsea Smile truly feared
Her imminent doom
She remembered the images on the news
And gave a frightened wail
When she looked back she realized
She was equally as frail
To frightened to run, too scared to think
Dear Chelsea couldn’t move
All she knew was I’m going to die
She knew it to be true
And then he brought down the knife
On miss Chelsea Smile’s face
And as he did, the killer laughed
And afterwards left the place
When investigators arrived on the scene
They knew just what went on
And they also knew that Chelsea Smile
Was too far dead and gone
As they looked at the body
The paramedics retched
It was even worse than they had seen
In the police team’s sketch
Poor Chelsea Smile’s perpetual frown
Was forcibly upturned
Her body was covered in bruises and marks
That made everyone’s stomach churn
Ripped in her face was one simple line
Stretching ear to ear
It was the smile she never gave
That was promised to save poor Chelsea dear