Im sorry I lied

As I lay alone in bed,
so many thoughts tormenting me.
I don't know why I lied to you,
I should've let everything be.

You see, this is what I wanted,
for you and I to stay away.
And when you told me to tell the truth,
I wasn't sure of what to say.

You asked me if I really loved you,
my heart was torn as I said no.
All that ran inside my head;
"I just can't let these feelings grow".

I said we wouldn't have a chance,
because we live too far apart.
That was the reason that I gave you,
but not the reason in my heart.

You're everything I ever looked for,
I love you more than just a friend.
But what if everything does change,
where will I stand at in the end?

I told you that this wasn't love,
I knew you'd never understand.
I didn't think it'd hurt this much,
though from the start I had it planned.

I tried denying all my feelings,
but it's killing me inside.
I said I didn't love you,
I'm so sorry that I lied.