Counting down the days.
Eleven years today,
and I still can't believe your gone.
Not an agonizing day passes by,
without a thought of you crossing my mind.
I still remember you,
I remember you like I'd remember a dream.
I remember all the stories you'd whisper my way.
I remember you telling me of the adventures we'd have one day.
I remember the smiles, the hugs you'd give,
telling me day after day that you'd never leave.
I remember your promises,
your pinky-swears,
your smiles,
reassuring me that you'd always be there with me to walk every mile.
I hold close to me through the nights,
the doll you gave to me when I was but three.
I hold onto the memories we shared,
afraid to let go of you.
And everyday,
I try to understand why you'd leave me here to stay,
when your nothing but yesterday's wind.
I'm afraid to take a step closer to the world,
I'm afraid of falling and not having you pick me up.
I'm afraid to believe that you're no longer here,
that you've left me here alone to face my fears.
These feeling of emptiness crawl through my skin.
I'm hurting everyday,
counting down my sins.
You aren't here to right my wrongs,
you aren't here to help me move on.
I'm trying to hang onto this life on my own,
I'm trying to get up off my knees,
but these tears are giving me the company I need.
I'd go to sleep at night,
wishing to see you once more,
wanting to walk through what separates my world from yours,
walking through that door.
I want you to know,
that I'm not doing okay,
I'm barely getting by,
I can't stay away.
I need to be where you now reside,
in a world you create,
in a world with no goodbyes.
Because this life I live,
isn't worth carrying on.
Not while you're no where in sight,
not if I can't see you tonight.
and I still can't believe your gone.
Not an agonizing day passes by,
without a thought of you crossing my mind.
I still remember you,
I remember you like I'd remember a dream.
I remember all the stories you'd whisper my way.
I remember you telling me of the adventures we'd have one day.
I remember the smiles, the hugs you'd give,
telling me day after day that you'd never leave.
I remember your promises,
your pinky-swears,
your smiles,
reassuring me that you'd always be there with me to walk every mile.
I hold close to me through the nights,
the doll you gave to me when I was but three.
I hold onto the memories we shared,
afraid to let go of you.
And everyday,
I try to understand why you'd leave me here to stay,
when your nothing but yesterday's wind.
I'm afraid to take a step closer to the world,
I'm afraid of falling and not having you pick me up.
I'm afraid to believe that you're no longer here,
that you've left me here alone to face my fears.
These feeling of emptiness crawl through my skin.
I'm hurting everyday,
counting down my sins.
You aren't here to right my wrongs,
you aren't here to help me move on.
I'm trying to hang onto this life on my own,
I'm trying to get up off my knees,
but these tears are giving me the company I need.
I'd go to sleep at night,
wishing to see you once more,
wanting to walk through what separates my world from yours,
walking through that door.
I want you to know,
that I'm not doing okay,
I'm barely getting by,
I can't stay away.
I need to be where you now reside,
in a world you create,
in a world with no goodbyes.
Because this life I live,
isn't worth carrying on.
Not while you're no where in sight,
not if I can't see you tonight.