Forgive Me Mommy...Please?

Life is nothing to these eyes of mine.
Love is just our imagination.
Everybody always says “I’m okay”.
When we all know they’re lying.

When I go I don’t want people crying.
I want to be remembered.
Not for my wild and stubborn behavior.
I just don’t want to be forgotten.

People will spend time trying to forget.
Please I don’t want that, I want to be remembered.
Tell my mommy I’m so very sorry I almost hit her.
Tell her I’m sorry I never said “I love you “to her.
Tell her I’m so fucking sorry for cutting.
I’m sorry mommy, just please forgive me.

When I think back I realize something.
I was never good. I was evil.
Let me take the time to say something truly meant sincere.
I’m sorry… I’m too sorry for words to say.
All I want is forgiveness from you mommy.
All I want is your love.
All I want is to make you proud.
Did I ever make you proud?

Have I earned my forgiveness?
Can I call you my best friend?
Mommy can you do something for me?
Forgive me please.