Insane, And Halfway Loving It

I know what she is going through,
I know its like a test,
But for some reason
I too want to be depressed.

I want to have the bloody arms,
I want to be in pain.
In my head there are alarms
Asking if I'm sane.

I've even tried to cut sometimes,
But the shame always stops me soon
And so I end up writing rhymes,
Telling my grief to the moon.

At first the pain
Had set me free,
Til it turned into limits,
Becoming part of me.

Please let me live
A little bit longer;
I just need to be
A little bit stronger.

Find a way to change
The course of nature.
I'm like an addict flying high;
Its all one scary adventure.