What I'd do for you...

I hear the chime, I clear my head.
I flip a dime, just to decide how I'll end up dead.

It's a constant struggle inside of me,
It feels like there's no light for me to follow.
Why is it so hard to see?
To see the light. I feel like I need a knife to swallow.

It feels like I'm carrying 20 pounds of broken glass shards, and every time i breathe, every shard penetrates my heart and everything inside of me shatters.

My life is just entirely composed by sad songs. I hear the strumming, the delicate tapping of the piano keys as the player engages himself into a soul-touching melody.

I hear the rain around the orchestra house, I hear it as it splatters.
I hear the children as they cry, oh what a beautiful tragedy.

I feel like my hearts bleeding,
Why are you so good at deceiving?
Tricking me into believing...

Into believing that you understood me. That we connected. I guess I'll never know why the caged bird sings, because I feel the chains around my ankles, and my song rings with hurt.

I guess to you, I'm nothing but dirt... Because of you, I'm always alert... Always alert of people who deceive, who can hurt just as well.

Because of you... I'm riddled with depression.
You scissored in a penetration to my heart. I make a selection of ways to harm myself...
Because of you. You don't realize what you did to me.

Are you happy?

Tell me you are... Because I'm dying for you.
I'm dying for you, while you're shining in the sun.

Does it hurt? I guess break-ups hurt both ways, but you don't even look phased.
Yes I've seen you're pictures, I envy you don't you know... You're joy has just left be dazed.

Because of you I'm en-caged...
This is just an outrage....

You still look beautiful. Don't you dare deny it, I'm here to tell you you're so bright.
So where is the light?
I can't find it, but you sure have. Girl, you're gifted that way...
Now I'm drifting every day. Dying inside...

So what do i wait for? After over six months, you'd think I'd get over you...
But here you are, somewhere in HERE... somewhere in my heart.
My heart? You tore through it like a flying dart.

Am i just a stringed puppet for you to control, my heart is just your toy.
So tell me girl, where did you get all this joy?
While i just sink.

I'll remember you though...
But you? I guess I'm easy to forget...

How could you be this low?
I guess to you, I'm just a regret.

Will you remember me?
Or am I invisible.

You've made me miserable...
I'm guessing you didn't notice.
Are you infected with blindness?
How was i suppose to know you where full of poison,
And that with it, you'd inject me.

After so long, here i lay.
Waiting for the day...
For the day you come to me, and I see your perfect face again.
My heart will fly, but I'll half to look away.
My heart will be sore, but you're nothing for me to adore.
Not anymore.

I guess i should just forgive and forget.
But it isn't so easy.. If i could, i would.
But you made such an impact on my heart.
To my heart, you where a work of art.

So here i lay...
I here the chime, I clear my head.
I flip a dime, just to decide how I'll end up dead.
Just to decide how I'll die for you.
It's nothing, really, I'm nothing special.
You cracked me open like a peanut shell.

I'm nothing special, nothing great.
Just another human on Earth, just one more. One more or one less, no one will notice.
I write my death note to you my love, I dedicate it to you my beautiful dove.

Here is where i say my goodbyes...
For all of you who i said I wouldn't do this to myself? Sorry for the lies...

Maybe YOU'LL remember me...
Sincerely, that ghost girl who loved you.

-Poem, By me.
xoxox