My protected killer

Maybe it's the last time,
I keep telling myself.

Maybe it's gone.
I say to myself.

But it always comes back,
I remind myself.

This addiction is going to kill me,
I have to tell myself.

It's back.
And it's not going away.

They symbols
and Xs
and lines
and words.

All perfectly planned out and sliced into my skin.

Hate
Regret
Love
Hell
Addiction
Father
Help me
Eli.

All of them forever taint my skin.

Butterflies
Hearts
Broken hearts
Smiles
Skulls

Four years invested into this addiction.

I thought I had kicked it.

Every time a I planted a new imperfection into my skin
I threw the silvery metal away.

This time she's safe.
My killer is protected in a drawer.

My killer is protected by me.