Cold

Surviving is the best i can do right now,
Im so cold,
Forgotten,
With white hot pain searing through my chest,
Thoughts screaming of empty promises,
Of marriage,
Of Christmases to be spent together,
Of secret smiles shared across a room,'
Ever causing my face to heat up,

Empty kisses,
Allowing myself to lie,
Filling it with all my passion,
You took this for granted,
Will you see what you had,
Once you have her?

I promise,
No one will love you like i do,
No one will try to make you as happy as i did,
But that girl is gone now,
You drowned her,
In empty secrets,
With lies,
And cold eyes meeting mine,

Now shes gone,
Im a shell, now,
Im not sure where to go,
Im not sure what im doing,
But i promise you this,
Ill get away from here,
Escape your tight embrace,
Though we're not together,
You still have a suffocating hold on me,
Fingers digging into my heart,
Thoughts escaping my skull,
Exiting through my mouth,

Now im with her,
And its not helping anything,
Shes not who she was,
Neither are you,
Your so much alike,
Sometimes i think you two should be together,
At least her promises of love arent empty,
She just has too much love for one person,
But im happy to accept what shes willing to give,

Ill take anything i can get,
Because Im a shell,
In desperate need to be filled,
Sometimes i wonder if,
You stole my soul, too,
If somehow,
The first time our lips met,
Our sould bound together,
Ropes hanging like a noose,
Clinging to our skin,

Id like to think you felt something,
Anything,
For me in return,
But i was just an occupation,
Someone to spend your time with,
Waste your affections on,
Waste your money on,
I only wanted your love,
Was that too much to ask?

I guess i couldnt plead for your love,
Because in the beginning,
I couldnt even give you my trust,

So now i think i deserve this pain,
This hollowness,
This cold..