I Wish

I wish I had fought for what I had.
I wish i could hold his hand once more.
I wish that I didn't feel so dead.
I wish that my arm had no scars.

I wish it had turned out differently.
I wish I could still meet his gaze.
I wish I could cope more efficiently.
I wish i could see through the fog.

I wish I could go back in history.
I wish I could fight for his love.
I wish that each day had no struggle.
I wish that I had not been afraid.

I wish my self loathing were banished.
I wish I could say how i feel.
I wish I could live without bottling it up.
I wish I could stop the damn reel.