Stuck at an Impass

Stuck at an Impass

These mistakes of mine keep lingering, lingering. These friends I thought were mine keep gossiping, gossiping. I can feel my anger control failing, failing. I cant stop myself from falling, falling. Left is right and right is lost. Up has fallen to its maker and down is shackled to my ankle. My rock bottom has hit rock bottom. I cant stand this place, its tearing me apart, eating me alive. My knees feeling weak, my eyelids growing heavy. Im slipping to the oblivion of my exile. Ive cast a line without a hook. Ive sunken my teeth into the bullet way to many times. Im chokming on the gunpowder, bleeeding from the shrapnel. I appear to live without myself, "Oh where oh where have I gone?" There are no doors to open, only the locks that conceal them. My wrists are pinned to the floor with the sorrow stained blades that slit them. Im falling, pull me in. Im falling, let me go. Drown me in my existence, its all they've ever done. Pupils turn a milky white, skin has grown so cold. To the devil my soul has been forever sold. A contract signed in tears that I never should have wept. My weaknesses are open, exposing all my fears. The light in this pit of despair is slowly going out. In my sleep I toss and turn, I scream, I cry, I shout. The nightmares are ripping at my wonderland. In these dreams I reach, only to lose an open hand. My happiness they've beaten, my knees they've thrown me to. But I will rise back up again, without a fight I will go not. They thought I would give in, "They thought, Oh yes, they thought."