Regretting Realizations

Day by day I struggle through
Fighting with constant tears
Trying to fight through my depression
And suicidal fears

Ive managed to push away
All family and friends
They could never understand what is wrong
The struggle that never ends

When I finally feel helpless
And search for someone to talk
I've realized my harsh words to you
And watch your back as away you walk

My pathetic highschool romance
Came to a crashing end
I've lost you by a mile
And along the way a few friends

I've brought this on myself
I knew better than to slip
I ignored myself anyway
And allowed myself to trip

Now here I am alone
Pocket knife in hand
I cant go to bed without it
Scars are in high demand

I clench the knife in my palm
And squeeze my eyes shut tight
I pray for sleep and daylight to cease
So I will no longer have to deal with my struggling fight