Mom

It isn't easy
Doing this alone
But it's even harder
When I can't pick up the phone and call you
Ask you about something new
Something that's never been easy
Not even
For you
I know we had a lot of good times
Even before the end
I always knew that
You were my best friend
Someone who understood
Who felt just like me
Someone who was the older version of me
It's okay
To wonder how things could of been
With a few more brothers and sisters
Or even a twin
I wonder daily how things would be
If you were the one still standing next to me
That the car hardly touched you
That this moment didn't end it all
I'm glad that you saw me
Walk and crawl
But everyday I'll wonder
If you ended it all
If you toke your life hoping to better mind
Thinking in your heart that I'd be just fine
But I'm not fine
I miss you
I dream about you daily
I deeply wish you
Could meet this baby
My daughter
Your granddaughter
Who is named after you
Guess I wish
I'd never lost you .
You who loved me so
Who was my world
Who left me alone
As a little girl